


Before the Fall

by Phoenecid



Series: Shadowhunters Canon AU's [1]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Clary Fray & Alec Lightwood Friendship, F/F, F/M, M/M, Minor Injuries, Season/Series 01, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-19
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2020-12-24 05:35:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 22,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21094241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phoenecid/pseuds/Phoenecid
Summary: He grunted in pain and looked down at his injury. Seeing the sliced flesh he huffed angrily. Reaching into his pocket he pulled out a pen-like object, without releasing her wrist he brought it up to one of his many complicated tattoos. It flared to life, his wounded skin knitting back together easily.She was still crouched there with one wrist limp in his hand, her mouth open wide.“So? How can you see me?”She gathered herself and snapped, “More importantly, what the fuck?”He rolled his eyes at her, “That’s a pretty open question, ‘what the fuck’ to what?”What-If Clary and Alec had met before the start of the series.





	1. first meetings

**Author's Note:**

> I have been obsessed with this idea for the longest time (lmao thanks maia for enabling me)
> 
> why does alec not have more friends? in this house we want our gay characters to have a secure support system and alec deserves some friends!! 
> 
> SO HERE'S ME FIXING IT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been EDITED LADS [04/2020]

“You have gotta be _ fuckin’ kidding me. _ ” The bouncer at the start of the line scoffed, with his arms crossed heavily across his massive chest, “Kid, if you think you’re getting in this club with that ID you’re dumber then you look’.” He stared down the short red haired teenager in front of him. 

Clary Fray glared back at him, stubbornly refusing to back down. Her face lit by the massive sign above her head, her scowl deepening the longer the staring contest between her and the bouncer lasted. Simon Lewis stood on her left side, his hand wrapped around her arm - attempting to tug her away from the confrontation. 

Once she finally realised that she wasn’t getting anywhere, she huffed - her face bright with frustration. She spun round and flounced away from the line. Simon followed her without hesitation, barely taking a second to gesture at the girl they had been in line with to wait. 

“It’s okay Fray,” He began, “It’s only a few months until you turn 18! Then we can go to all the clubs we want!  _ Without  _ using fake ID’s.” 

Clary sighed heavily and came to a stop, “I know you’re right Si, but it would’ve been nice to get in.” She turned to him, “You know, you're 18. You could just head on in.”

Simon shrugged, before nudging her shoulder with his; “Well yeah but, it’d be more fun with you.” He flushed slightly at the end of his sentence, smiling at her tentatively.

“I’m sorry for dragging you out tonight. You should stay, go have fun! I’m sure Maureen would appreciate the company,” They both look back in the direction of the club. The girl from earlier is standing to the side of the line, she waves when she sees them looking. “I think I’m just gonna grab a cab back home.”

Simon frowned, “If you’re sure - I can wait until you get into a cab if you want? Or I could give you a ride? I’d like it if you weren’t wandering the streets of New York on your own.” 

“I’m not a child Simon, besides, I could use the time to cool off a little bit - really don’t want Mom asking why I’m so fired up.” 

He laughed a little, “Okay. If you’re sure? Just - you know the system, text me when you’re safe inside.” He waved to her as he hurried towards the front of the club where Maureen was waiting. 

Watching him go, Clary looked around for a cab. After a few minutes of no luck, she shrugged and decided that she would just walk home instead, it wasn't  _ too  _ far - and she knew the streets quite well.

She made her way along the street steadily, the lights above her shining like stars in the night sky, guiding her way. She paused for a moment, fishing her phone from her pocket to take a picture of the darkened street lit by only streetlights and streaks of moonlight. Her mind abuzz with how she could portray the image with paint. 

The night air sharp against her exposed skin as she flicked through her phone to find the best photo. Saving her favourite ones and deleting the others she noticed that she had come to a stop near a grungy looking alleyway. Glancing down the alley cautiously her eyes were instantly drawn to a slumped figure she could barely make out.

Turning so she could see the alleyway properly, she tilted her head and squinted. Her breath quickened, hands tightened into fists by her sides, she took a nervous step forward. The figure was a man - covered in blood, and obviously unconscious. 

Concern ran through her like a bolt, whoever that was, they could be hurt. She knew that logically it would be best if she left well enough alone. She knew that she could be putting herself in a very dangerous situation. 

However… 

She couldn’t leave someone to suffer - even at risk to herself. 

She nodded to herself confidently, she decided she would just get close enough to see if the man was okay, offer her assistance and then be on her way as quickly as possible. She took a small step into the alleyway - her eyes surveying the area about her as she moved. It probably wasn’t the nastiest alley she had ever seen, but it wasn’t particularly  _ nice _ . 

Getting closer to the man she could see that he was attractive, and young. Around her age, maybe a few years older judging from the many tattoos that she could see. His hair was pitch black and matted with a thick black substance. He wore all black combat gear, his shirt nearly non-existent due to the damage he had sustained to his abdomen. There was an empty, weirdly shaped holster strapped to one thigh. As she noted earlier, he was covered in blood - it also had also begun to puddle beneath him. A sword stained with the same gunk that was in his hair, rested at his side the hilt in a limp hand.

She gasped in shock, her hand reaching out for his wound, wanting to put pressure on the dangerous looking gash. As she neared the wound, her wrist was snagged by a much larger hand. She jerked back in an automatic gesture of shock, but was unable to move as the action didn’t even jar the hold on her wrist. Looking up from his injury - she could see his eyes were open. The glare on his face unhindered by the river of blood that ran from his hairline to his chin. 

He spoke quietly, voice rough; “How can you see me?” 

She gaped at him. Her mouth moving, words escaping her.

He grunted in pain and looked down at his injury. Seeing the sliced flesh he exhaled angrily. Reaching into his pocket he pulled out a pen-like object, without releasing her wrist he brought it up to a patch of skin that was unmarked by tattoos or injury. She gasped as he began to write on his skin using the pen, the object leaving behind a golden glow. They were both staring at his abdomen as his wounded skin knitted back together, no evidence of the wound left behind. 

Clary was still crouched next to him, with one wrist limp in his hand, her mouth open wide when he looked up at her again. 

“So? How can you see me?” 

She gathered herself and snapped, “More importantly,  _ what the fuck  _ ?” 

He rolled his eyes at her, “That’s a pretty open question, ‘what the fuck’ to what?”

She stuttered for a second, her free hand flailing next to her wildly - gesturing to him, “‘What? T-this? Obviously the wound!  _ You in general _ ?”

He sighed, obviously thinking this was a waste of his time. He released her hand and rose to his feet, she followed him quickly. 

“You shouldn’t be able to see me.” 

“So you keep saying!  _ You  _ shouldn’t be  _ alive  _ !”

He let out a snort, before his face contorted back into a scowl once he realised what he had done. 

“I’m fine.” With that he began to walk to the end of the alley, she rushed to keep up. Her thoughts from before having been confirmed, he was  _ tall _ . Taller than anyone she’d met. Probably taller than even Luke if she was guessing. 

“I’m Clary!” She called out to him. 

He scoffed at her, throwing a look over his shoulder he responded, “Alec.” 

And then he was gone.


	2. A Week Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clary sees Alec again - Simon is there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly never expected any kind of positive reception to this? Thank you to everyone who left kudos/comments I'm so happy!!
> 
> (And even more thanks to the amazing Maia who lets me throw ideas at her at 4am)

Clary wouldn't say that the weird events from last week were all that she could think about, but, really it’s all she could think about.

After the encounter with some sort of New York Cryptid, she'd made her way back home

After she had made her way back home in a complete daze, she'd stumbled past her mother - ignored the questions, and collapsed onto her bed. Sleep had been hard to come by as her brain raced over what had happened. 

There was something weird about the encounter - and she wasn’t talking about the magically disappearing wounds. 

The week that had followed had been dull, and she’d taken the lull as an excuse to tirelessly recount the events of that night to her best friend. 

“I’m telling you Simon, he was injured and on the floor one second--” 

Simon interrupts, rolling his eyes, “Mhmm, and then he miraculously recovered and sauntered off.” 

Clary huffs, “I’m telling you, it really happened!” 

They were sat, huddled together at a table in their favoured coffee shop; Saltwater Cafe. Their hot mugs warmed their hands as they talked.

Simon huffed, his glasses were fogged slightly from the steam rising from his coffee

“Look Fray, you’ve had a stressful couple of weeks. You saw a homeless guy, you freaked and your mind helped with the rest.” 

Clary rolled her eyes, letting her mug hit the table with a soft thump as she sighed and turned from Simon to stare out of the large window of the cafe - she tapped absently at the ceramic with her fingernail. She was stopped from her fidgeting as Simon pulled the cup out of her hand, she realised Simon was rising from the table, presumably to grab them a refill. 

Still staring blankly, Clary blinked quickly as she noticed a flash of black hair, pale skin, and _ tattoos _\- that she recognised easily. She stood abruptly, knocking her chair to the floor, sprinting out of the cafe eager to follow the retreating figure. 

“Alec!” She called. 

She watched as he whipped around to look at her, his face creased with confusion. She took in combat gear, the multiple weapons, and the deep scowl on his face - some part of her thought she should probably be scared at how intimidating a figure Alec cut, but she brushed that off.

“You.” It wasn’t a question, the confusion had faded from his face and an anxious curiosity had set in. “You can still see me.”

She nodded furiously, “Why do you keep asking that?” 

“Clary? Are you okay?” 

A panting Simon stood behind her, hands on his knees as he tried to regain his breath -his eyes wide with concern. 

“I turned around and you were running out of the cafe, did something happen?” He rose from his bent position and placed his hands on his hips, his eyebrows rose; “Were you talking to someone?” 

Clary gestured vaguely at Alec, “Simon _ this _is the guy I was telling you about.” 

Simon tilted his head to look over her shoulder, “Clary,” He laughed nervously. “-Clary who are you talking about?” 

Clary refrained from stomping her foot petulantly, “Obviously _ him _.” Pointing at Alec directly now, whose lips were twitching as if he was attempting to contain his smile. 

“He can’t see me.” 

“Clary I can’t see anyone. Are you _ sure _you’re okay?” 

She spluttered, put out. “I-I’m fine!” She glared at Alec, who shrugged in response. 

Simon nodded haltingly, “Coming back to the cafe?” He asked. 

“Actually,” She said, “I’m gonna head home.” 

Simon smiled at her concern still filling his eyes, “Okay. Do you want me to walk you back?” 

“No, I think I just need some alone time.”

“Let me know if you get back safe?”

She nodded and they parted ways. 

She span, glaring; “What the _ fuck _?”

The man in front of her didn’t look apologetic at the fact that he’d made her look crazy in front of her best friend, he actually looked deeply amused by the situation.

“Why couldn’t he see you?” 

“He doesn’t have the sight _ obviously_. More to the point; why can _you _see me? Are you a werewolf? Newly turned?”

“Because you’re_ right there _!” She paused, “What do you mean by ‘werewolf’.” 

“So you’re not a downworlder?”

“A _ what-worlder _?” 

“Oh. We should probably talk about this.” 

“No, _ really _?”

* * *

As they turned and walked back to the cafe she’d vacated by chasing him, she was vaguely happy to notice Simon was no longer there. She loved him, he was like a brother to her but she didn’t want him seeing her apparently talking to thin air.

They find a little two-person table in the corner, further away from the window than her previous seat. Clary looks at him, he looks so stiff despite the cosy atmosphere. Like he’d never really been in a cafe before. 

“Want something to drink?” She asks cautiously. 

He looks conflicted for a second before nodding, when no further information is offered she shrugs and decides to get him something random.

Returning to the table she places the pumpkin spice latte down in front of him. She grins at him, he seems like the type of guy who would object to it on principle. He doesn’t. He takes a sip and actually smiles at her a little. 

“It’s nice, thank you.” 

They sit there in silence for a little while, enjoying their drinks. She coughs awkwardly. 

“So, why couldn’t Simon see you? Can people see you right now? Do people think I’m talking to no one right now? Do they think your drink is just floating?!”

He chuckles at her questions; “I cancelled the glamour when we were walking.”

“The _ what _?” She shook her head, “Wait. I need a minute.” 

He seemed to find her confusion the most amusing thing he’d ever encountered. 

“I could start from the beginning I suppose?” At her nod, he continued, “My name is Alec Lightwood, I’m a Shadowhunter and all the stories you’ve been told are true.” 

“Cool. Is that like - a catchphrase or something? What does it mean?” 

The man- _ Alec _, sighed, “Werewolves, Seelies, Vampires and Warlocks,” He paused, dramatically; “All of them are real. I’ve got to admit I’m shocked you don’t know this - how else would you have been able to see me?” 

Clary looked at him, clearly in shock. She stuttered slightly as she tried to form words. 

“You’re sure your not a werewolf?” 

She huffed, “I think I would know if I were a _ werewolf _!” 

He smirked at her, “Would you?” 

He snorted at her shocked squeak. 

“Have you seen anything strange recently?” He asked. 

“Other than you almost dying in an alleyway?” 

He scoffs; “I wasn’t almost dying. I just had a minor injury.” 

“Yeah, a minor injury that had your guts spilling out.” 

He sighs. “I’m serious. It’s almost unheard of for someone without ties to the shadow-world to be able to see us. We should probably figure out what’s different about you.” 

“I’m just me, there’s nothing special about me!”

“Well, obviously that’s not true,” He paused as a waiter approached their table to clear away their now empty cups, he smiled and thanked the man, who blushed furiously as he smiled back. 

Clary’s eyes lit up as she watched the waiter retreating, “Awh he _ liked _you!” 

Alec flushed and coughed awkwardly, “ Anyway. _Clary_, we should probably look into this, right?” 

She groaned; “Urgh, you’re the responsible type huh?” 

“Comes with being a big brother.” 

“You have siblings? Tell me about them!” 

“We’re getting off track,” He glanced at his watch, “Shit. I have to go. Look, take my number. Message me if anything strange happens.” He got to his feet, and turned to leave

“Wait!” She called, “Can we meet up at some point? I’d just really appreciate a more in-depth explanation!” 

He nodded cautiously, “Sure.”


	3. Magnus Bane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A wild Magnus Bane appears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ashjdkf do I hate this chapter? absolutely! do i think it's pacing rushed? oh of course! am i going to post it anyway? ye-huh 
> 
> i haven't written anything in years and trying to get back in the saddle is so HARD my dudes 
> 
> thanks to every single one of you for your comments & kudos i appreciate it so much, gives me confidence to continue writing!

“It’s not that I don’t love my siblings but sometimes they just make me,” Alec paused, “So angry?”

Clary nods, “I get that, you’re trying to do things by the book - and when they go against the rules, it makes you feel like they’re going against you personally.” 

He looked at Clary, lips pursed - trying to find a way that he could deny the explanation she just gave. Then he sighed and nodded tightly. 

“You’re right, sometimes it just feels like they don’t care about me? Like I know - logically that they do, but when they go out of their way to- to dismiss me, to act like I’m not any fun because I don’t want to break out and go clubbing surrounded by people I don’t know.. It’s just so..  _ Shit _ .”

They had been meeting up regularly for months, always at the same coffee shop - never the same day or time but every week they made sure to find time to sit and talk. At first it had just been about Clary’s unnatural talent of seeing the Shadow World, then they slowly worked their way into talking about everything in their lives. Their friendship flourishing throughout these meetings. 

“Anyway,” Alec said, placing his mug down as he hurried to change the subject; “Have you tried asking your mom anymore questions about the whole sight business.” 

Clary grunted in frustration, taking a long drink before replying “I’ve been trying to ask, believe me. Every time I even so much as mention anything of the sort she just starts to talk over me. She did tell me that I have an appointment with a doctor later on today - Dr. Bane. Apparently we’ve been going to him for years? Honestly, I don’t remember the guy--” 

“ _ Bane _ ? Where about is this appointment?” 

“I think she said somewhere near Sixth Avenue and Christopher Street.”

“I’ll meet you there.” 

“What? Why? Alec it’s apparently a routine appointment. No need to get all over-protective.” 

“A routine appointment. That you apparently have every year. With a person you don’t remember. That just so happens to be scheduled after you’ve been trying to ask your mom about the Shadow World? With a person whose name just so happens to be the same as The High Warlock of Brooklyn? Clary. You can’t believe that this is all coincidental!” 

Clary stared at him incredulously, “Alec, I think you’re a bit paranoid.” 

He stared back, unflinching; “Clary, I think you’re not paranoid enough.” 

Rolling her eyes she gave in, “Fine. When we get to the place I’ll send you a picture so you can tell where we are.” 

Alec nodded, “Good. I mean, come on Fray - even if it’s nothing, it’s better to have backup just in case.” 

“You are such a big brother.” 

  
  
  


Making their way towards the West Village, Clary and Jocelyn walked in an uncomfortable silence. There had been multiple stilted attempts to begin a conversation, but her mom had only answered with one worded sentences, speeding up slightly with every attempt. _ _

_ At this point she’s basically running,  _ Clary thought. She looked up as they approached a large apartment building. She paused, sneaking her phone out, she took a quick photo and sent it to Alec. She slid her phone back into her pocket as her mom turned round, looking at her desperately. 

“Clary, let’s go!” She gestured to the foreboding looking doors behind her.

“Mom, can I not have a minute to catch my breath?” 

“Clary, I-I just think it’s important that we get this over with,” Jocelyn said, “I think we’ll both feel a lot better afterwards.” 

Her phone buzzed in her pocket, signalling that Alec was nearby. She felt a bit better knowing she wasn’t entering the unknown alone. She sighed, resigned. Reluctantly making her way through the doors that her mom was holding open. 

After trekking their way up to the top floor of the apartment building, they came to a stop outside a grand looking set of double doors. Joceyln raised a fist to knock against the wooden door, before her hand could make contact the door flew open to reveal the strikingly attractive figure of a tall asian man. 

“Magnus,” Jocelyn breathed, “She- She’s remembering I think.” 

“So soon?” The man- Magnus turned to look Clary in the eyes, “Biscuit, so lovely to see you again.” 

“I wish I could say the same, but I don’t recall ever meeting you.” 

Magnus laughed delighted at the snark, “Ah, I’m afraid that’s all on me.” He froze, his face clouding suddenly. 

  
“It seems you have a shadow.” 

“What?” Joceyln gasped. 

“Someone’s following you. They’ve just entered the parameter of my wards.”

Clary froze, knowing who he was talking about. She wracked her brain frantically, her eyes darting about - knowing that she wouldn’t be able to spot Alec, but trying anyway. 

Magnus’ handsome face was marred with a scowl, “Let me just take care of that,” He raised his hand and went to click his fingers, only stopping when Clary lurched forwards with a cry. 

“Biscuit?” 

“Clary?”

She glared at them from where she stood, holding Magnus’ wrist; “No. Don’t hurt him.” 

“You know who’s following you?” 

She nods tightly, “He’s my friend, he was worried about me.” 

Magnus’ lowered his arm, her hand dropping from his wrist, his face had softened substantially; “Why don’t you ask your friend to come out?”

Backing up slightly she nodded, her hand sliding into her pocket to tug out her phone. She sent a message to Alec telling him to come up. Hoping she doesn’t sound too panicked and that he wouldn’t assume the worst. 

“Clary what’s going on? Who is this friend?” Jocelyn asked. 

“Maybe we should head inside before the questions begin.” Magnus gestured them both into his loft, following and closing the door behind them. 

“Clary!” Jocelyn shouted, “Who is this friend? Why did he follow you here? Is it Simon?” 

“It’s not Simon.” She answered tersely. 

“Clary, can you answer me properly?” 

“Oh because you were so upfront with me earlier?” 

“Clarissa Fray!” 

Magnus coughed awkwardly, gaining their attention, “Anyway, Biscuit! I should reintroduce myself, I’m Magnus Bane,” He paused turning towards the balcony doors, “And  _ who _ , are  _ you _ ?”

Standing in the doorway to the balcony was Alec Lightwood, intimidating as always, his face locked in his usual glare. Clary could tell his hands were itching to hold a weapon of some sort.

  
“ _ This _ is my friend. Alec Lightwood.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- alec talking about his siblings is inspired by how i feel every single time they undermine him in the show lmao (imma make them have a confrontation at some point ya best BELIEVE) 
> 
> \- malec aren't going to be romantically involved straight away, alec needs to be able to be his own person before he can be someone in a relationship ok 
> 
> \- the next chaps will be considerably bigger these establishing ones are KILLING ME 
> 
> \- also like, how did jocelyn explain away clary needing to see this random dude almost every year? like obvs she wouldn't remember it afterwards but,, what about getting her there? especially as she grew? im assuming it had to be regularly re-applied? was this explained in the show? lemme know


	4. Truth Hurts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jocelyn u got some 'splain to doooo 
> 
> (Jocelyn explains her side of the story - but is it the whole story?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey hey hey! Thanks again for the kudos and comments you're all so appreciated <3
> 
> Jocelyn explains herself - I am actively trying to keep some of the truth from Clary on Jocelyn's behalf so if theres anything in the explanation it might just be on purpose! 
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter!

To say that Alec Lightwood hadn’t been expecting this turn of events when he decided to follow behind Clary would be an understatement. Being the strategist he is, he’d become accustomed to planning for almost every situation he’d ever come across. This was ever so slightly different. 

Having to follow behind Clary and her mother wasn’t a hardship - nothing too different to what he did on his patrols. Maintain a safe distance while keeping an eye on the target - easy. Not so easy; is his ‘target’ entering a heavily warded building - wards that he knew would notify the caster of his presence as soon as he neared them.

Thinking of the companionship he and Clary had shared recently, he quickly decided the risk was worth it - he would rather keep Clary safe. Before he could prepare a plan for entering the building his phone buzzed in his pocket. He slid it out, Clary’s message blinking on the screen obnoxiously. He stood from his position and glanced up at the penthouse balcony. He quickly calculated the height, and the strength of the jump he would need to reach the balcony.

_ Time to make an impression _ , he thought. 

He grabbed his stele and brought it to the rune on his left bicep, the rune flaring to life easily. 

As he landed gracefully on the balcony, he stepped up to the open doors - staring at the three occupants stood inside. His gaze was drawn to the single male in the room for a second, he drew in a sharp breath - the man was handsome, probably the most beautiful man he’d ever seen. His eyes widened in shock as the man’s gaze locked with his, a soft flush adorning his cheeks as the man began to speak.

“Who are  _ you _ ?”

Alec stuttered softly, but was ultimately saved from answering by Clary’s harsh reply. He stepped into the room, his focus now solely on his friend, the handsome man pushed to the back of his thoughts, his concern for Clary prominent. He approached Clary, his eyes darting over her body looking for any injuries, “You okay?” He whispered as he got closer, tilting his head so he had eyes on the other two people in the room. She nodded, her lips pressed tightly together and her hands clenched into fists. 

“Clary, this  _ stranger-- _ ” Clary’s mother began to say. 

Clary’s glare silenced her, “As I said before, 'this stranger' is my friend, who was concerned about me. He wanted to make sure I was okay." 

Magnus tutted where he was standing, he gestured and his hand glowed with red energy, summoning a drink to his hand. Alec stared at him, distracted momentarily by the flash of gold in the warlocks eyes. 

"I think it's time to come clean Jocelyn dear." 

Taking a deep breath Jocelyn gathered herself, she looked at Clary soft eyes. 

“Clary, I-I want you to know that I did this for you. The decisions I made, the hard choices - all for you.” 

Clary barely held back an eye roll, nodding for her mother to continue. Alec stepped back from where he was previously in front of her, now standing to her side, glaring at Jocelyn from where he stood.

“I suppose it started when I fell in love with a man, his name was Valentine Morganstern.” 

Clary felt Alec’s hand as it landed on her shoulder, she turned to look at him - his eyes were hard, his mouth stretched into a foul frown. 

“Alec?” She asked quietly. 

He shook his head tightly, his gaze remaining on her mother. 

“I was sixteen, we attended the Academy together with Lucian,” 

“Luke!?” Clary exclaimed.

Jocelyn nodded, “Valentine was the most charming person I have ever met. Myself, Luke and others flocked to him. His presence was overwhelming. Clary, you have to believe me, I had no idea what I was getting myself - and my children, into. He wasn’t a bad man at the beginning, when he was younger. He had strong opinions, ones I didn’t agree with, and I don’t agree with them now.”

“We got married, fresh out of the Academy - we were in love, I-I didn’t notice any of the red flags,” She took a steadying breath. “We had a child, we were happy for awhile - but, it got harder to ignore his work. The screams I could hear from the basement of the house, how distant he was. It wasn’t until Luke was Turned that I saw his true self.” 

Her hands shake, she wraps her arms around herself.

“Luke was Valentine’s ‘Parabatai’.”

Clary glanced at Alec, Jocelyn smiled slightly. “I see you’ve been informed of those.” 

At Clary’s nod she continued, “When Luke was Turned into a werewolf, he came to us. His friends, his parabatai. For comfort, for understanding. H-he didn’t get that. Valentine took Luke away - into the forest nearby and when he returned.” She paused. 

“He returned and informed me that Luke had killed himself. I was devastated, I became depressed and unable to sleep. It wasn’t until I got a call, when I was told Luke was still alive and the leader of a pack Brocelind Forest that I really started to hate Valentine.” 

“After that, I struggled to deal with the fact that the Valentine I had fallen in love with - wasn’t the man he said he was. Weeks later, one night when I couldn’t sleep, I heard screams again. That time I couldn’t ignore it, having grown up in the house we were living in at the time. I was easily able to gain access to the basement. The things I saw down there - that was what finally made me realise I had to leave.” 

“However, I couldn't. there were more important things to do - I worked together with Luke to warn Downworlders about The Circle - and their plans to destroy the Downworld and any Shadowhunters who disagreed. I stayed with Valentine. I discovered many things, his multiple experiments. On me, on my unborn child and on other members of the Circles unborn children.” 

At this she looked directly at Alec, their eyes met briefly. She looked away first, his harsh glare making her unable to maintain eye contact. 

“Time passed and I was so scared he would discover my betrayal, I managed to secure some precautions for myself with the help of Ragnor. The day of The Uprising came, the day that Valentine had planned for months, this was the day that our plans for revolution came to fruition. I couldn’t kill him myself. I hadn’t the strength, I asked Lucian to do it for me, but Valentine was smarter - he used me for leverage and took me from the battlefield before abandoning me. I knew where he was head so I followed him back to what was our home.” 

She began to shake uncontrollably, tears falling down her cheeks. 

“What I found was a burnt out husk. In the ruins I found the bodies of my parents, and Valentine-” 

She pauses, “I knew I was pregnant so I had to get you away from there. I knew that the only way to keep you safe was to keep you oblivious to the Shadow World. Make sure that you didn’t remember, I did everything I had to - so I could keep you  _ safe _ .”

At the end of her story she lets herself flop back onto the seat behind her, curling in on herself slightly. 

Alec stares at his friends mother, questions filling his mind. 

“So you’re Jocelyn Fairchild, wife of Valentine Morgenstern.” The woman in question flinches slightly before nodding at the name. 

He looks at her intently for a moment, before turning to the shell shocked Clary, “Clary you’re an only child correct?” 

At her hesitant nod, and Jocelyn’s fearful look, Alec continues - “I  _ thought  _ so, however - I distinctly remember playing with a small boy in your house when I was a child, Ms Fairchild. Not to mention the many slip ups you made while telling your story.” 

Clary gasps, “The use of ‘children’ instead of ‘child’, talk of a child years before I would have been born,” She looks at her mother, confusion and concern shining in her eyes, “D-Do I have a sibling?” 

Jocelyn shakes her head, pain obvious in her very being “No. H-He perished in the fire along with your father.” 

Clary’s eyes shudder close, her breaths beginning to become strained and harsh, Alec quickly guides her to a sofa nearby. He pushes her down softly, whispering comforting words to her as he kneels next to her. 

Jocelyn stumbles to her feet - reaching for Clary desperately, “Clary you have to understand-” 

Magnus steps smoothly in front of her, blocking her path to her daughter, “Perhaps you should sit back down Jocelyn dear.” 

Sat on the sofa Clary takes Alec’s hand from her shoulder, holding it in a loose grip for comfort. She looks up at Jocelyn, “Understand what? I don’t understand anything anymore. I-I think I’d like to be alone - I don’t think I can trust you anymore, and I definitely can’t look at you right now.” 

“Clary, please!” 

“Biscuit, if you want to stay here for a little while, it’s the least I could do.” 

Hearing Magnus’ offer Clary glanced towards him, before looking towards Alec for guidance. He smiled at her encouragingly, his hand squeezing hers. Ignoring her mother’s protests she nodded,

“I’d like that Magnus.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Would you believe that Johathan and Alec genuienly did play together when they were toddlers? Its mentioned briefly in the books I believe (or did I pull it out of my ass? idk but I remembered it and in my mind it sounded an awesome way to expose Jocelyn aha) Thinking logically I do believe Alec would have retained that information from his early years (bc he's alec) 
> 
> Please let me know about any mistakes, I'm sure there are plenty!


	5. Conversations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus and Alec talk, Alec has a teeny confrontation with his siblings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Thanks for reading and for the kudos and comments! (And once again thanks to Maia for reading through these!)

Waking up on a couch in Magnus Bane’s spacious loft wasn’t where Alec had expected to end up after the confrontation the night before. He could feel his feet hanging over the edge of the chair that was too small for him, his neck stiff from the uncomfortable angle it had been forced into for the night. Reluctantly, he pushed himself up using the arm of the chair he was occupying, squinting against the light flooding in from the doors he had entered through previously. He used his hand to shield his eyes as he settled back onto the couch.

A mug was thrust in front of him, he groggily grunted and took the offered coffee. Magnus chuckled lightly, 

“Not a morning person, huh?” 

Alec muttered incoherently, sighing as he took a drink. He lowered the cup and looked towards Magnus who was hovering awkwardly in front of him. 

“The absolute _ opposite  _ of a morning person,” He smiled slightly at Magnus, “Wanna sit down?” he gestured to the space next to him. Magnus chuckled and sat next to him. Alec flushed at the proximity. 

“So I have a few questions,” Magnus began, turning to face Alec; “How did you and Biscuit meet? I’m assuming you would have thought her a mundane, and it’s unlike Shadowhunters to associate with those different to them.”

He asked the question casually, clearly not intending to insult Alec - merely stating a known fact.

Alec laughed softly, “We met under - unusual circumstances. I was injured during my patrol, she found me - and then bugged me until I got coffee with her on a regular basis. That being said,” he shrugged, “I enjoy her company. She’s surprisingly likeable, I suppose.”

Magnus huffed, amused. 

“What about you Mr. Bane? I’m surprised you were helping Jocelyn Morgenstern- knowing her to be Valetine’s wife.” 

“Please - Call me Magnus. As for helping Jocelyn, I’d like to joke about it being about the money, but I have an unfortunate soft spot for both children and those seeking redemption. When Jocelyn landed on my doorstep, both of those soft spots were easily hit. I didn’t approve of Jocelyn’s methods in handling Biscuit but - mother knows best. Until her daughter finds out and hates her for it.” 

Alec let out a snort of laughter, before his tone took on a more serious note, “I’m sure Clary won’t be angry forever - for her sake I hope they can reconcile eventually.”

“Optimistic for a Shadowhunter! Protective too, hm? Clary said you were worried about her and that’s why you came with her. Let me guess, you’re an elder brother?” 

Alec nodded, his eyebrows furrowing slightly at the thought of his siblings, “Yea--” 

“Coffee?” 

Alec and Magnus both turned to look at the stumbling form of Clary, as she made her way into the main area of the loft. Her hair bundled on top of her head in a messy bun, day old make-up flaking on her face. She made grabby hands for the mug that Alec was still holding.

He let her take it from him, watching as she took a long sip only to encounter a completely empty cup. She whined helplessly at the lack of coffee. 

Magnus laughed, “Another morning person!” 

Alec stood smiling, allowing Clary to slump into his place on the couch, 

“I have to get back to The Institute.” He looked at his watch, “It’s just past eight so luckily I shouldn’t be too late for any meetings I have.” 

Alec placed a hand on the top of Clary’s head, jostling her slightly, “You’re gonna be okay, right Fray?” At the nod he received he turned to Magnus, “Thanks for letting me sleep here, and for letting Clary stay here for awhile.” 

Magnus waved him off, “Please don’t worry about it Alexander. I’m happy to do it. Would you like me to portal you close to the Institute.” 

Alec shook his head, “I could use the walk honestly, and I wouldn’t want to ask anything else of you.” 

They smiled at each other for a second, before Alec turned and shouted a goodbye at Clary. Receiving an equally vocal farewell in return. He smiled at Magnus again before he began his walk back home.

  
  
  


The New York Institute. 

Magnificent in its grandeur. Unseen by the New Yorkers and many tourists that pass it daily. 

Alec stood, just outside of the large double doors that led to his home. He sighed harshly, already anticipating the unnecessary interrogation he would no doubt be forced to endure. 

He’d barely made it a few steps into the Institute before his siblings descended on him like a pack of vultures,

  
“Alec? Are you only just coming home?”

“Where were you? You've been gone all night!” 

He hummed non committedly, pushing past them easily. Not wanting to give them an answer when he knew it would have to be a lie. He continued his trek inside. He wasn’t in the mood for the questions they were asking, nor the demanding harshness of their tone of voice. 

“Are you really ignoring us right now? Alec we’re just concerned about you!” 

“It’s not right for you to let us worry about you and then just brush us off!” 

He came to a stop abruptly, Jace knocking into his back as he was forced to a halt - Izzy stumbling to avoid the same collision. Alec span round, his shoulders stiff as he curled his hands into fists, his face contorting into a scowl.. He glared at them, anger obvious in his stance. 

“So, when I ask about what you’ve been up to after you’ve been partying and drinking all night - I’m, what was it? ‘A buzzkill and an asshole’, but  _ you  _ demand to know my whereabouts after one night of being out and you’re ‘concerned’. When I stay up,  _ concerned -  _ fretting about whether or not either of you are hurt I’m ‘overreacting’ but I want to have one piece of privacy and it’s ‘ _ not right _ ’ of me. Sure. Whatever.” He scoffed. 

“Alec, this isn’t one night! You’ve been going out  _ constantly _ ; not telling us where you’re going, we just - we want to make sure you’re okay! It’s not like you at all! ” Izzy said.

His nails were starting to bite into his flesh, his scowl deepened - turning his head to look Izzy in the eyes. 

“Since when do you  _ care _ ? I’ve been going for walks to clear my head, I’ve been leaving the Institute because I’ve been feeling the pressure from  _ our parents  _ because you two keep going out, partying - because you two keep doing whatever it is you like. Excuse the  _ fuck  _ out of me for needing some time on my own.” 

With that he span round, and headed for his room - leaving his siblings to stare after him in shock. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first scene is ABSOLUTELY a take on that scene from 2x18 where it's shown Alec stayed the night


	6. Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clary and Magnus have a lil conversation & Simon rushes in (kinda)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone for their VERY supportive comments I love to read/respond to them. hope this chapter continues to live up to expectations :)

“And  _ that’s  _ the reason I’m banned from Peru!” 

Slumped on Magnus’ expensive sofa Clary was bent in half where she sat, clutching at her stomach as tears filled her eyes. Taking gasping breaths she looks to Magnus who was similarly wiping tears of mirth from his face. Clary felt happy for the first time in weeks.

“That was the  _ best  _ story I’ve heard in my entire life,” She threw her head back on the couch, “So, how old are you exactly? Some of the things you mentioned in that story, clearly that didn't happen in this decade.” 

Magnus tuts at her, “Didn’t you know it’s impolite to ask a Warlock their age Biscuit,” he winks; “Besides, I have to keep  _ some  _ of my secrets - it’s a part of my  _ mystique _ .” 

  
Clary snorted inelegantly, an indulgent smile spreading across her face. 

She was beginning to see who Magnus Bane really was, he had spent the previous two weeks attempting to cheer her up. Even after many failed attempts he still tried, and she appreciated that more than she could put into words. He was kind, generous and one of the funniest people she had ever had the pleasure of meeting. He helped her come to grips with the new reality she was facing- but never pushed her to contact her mother. 

She hadn’t heard from her mom the entire time she’d been here; she couldn’t help but think that it wasn’t a bad thing. The betrayal was still fresh on her mind; while she could understand her mother’s reasoning it was hard to forgive. She needed time. That’s not to say her mom hadn’t been on Clary’s mind, it was almost all she could think of; her mom, alone in their apartment, upset about Clary’s absence. 

“Has Alexander called you today?” 

She was startled out of her thoughts by Magnus’ voice. She frowned at the question, her eyebrows furrowing. Clary shook her head. 

“Not today. Yesterday he mentioned that his parents were visiting so he didn’t know how often he’d be able to get away. Apparently his parents can be really overbearing.” 

At Magnus’ understanding nod she continued. 

“I’m kind of worried about him. I think he takes on too much. I appreciate him coming to see me, and checking in on me - but all I can think about is how tired he looks? I don’t know what goes on at that Institute of his but it looks like it stresses him out beyond belief. Yet here I am, needlessly bothering him with my inconvenient problems.” 

“Such is the way of a Head of an Institute my dear, he has plenty of responsibility on his head,  _ _ but that doesn’t mean you should feel guilty about going to him about your problems--” 

“But--” 

“Clary, believe me, I understand what you’re feeling. However, if Alexander thought you were ‘needlessly bothering him’ doesn’t he seem like the type of person to say something?” 

She nodded, stiffly. 

“Besides that I don’t think Alexander would consider your problems inconvenient in the slightest. His friend, revealed as the unknown daughter of Valentine Morgenstern? He’s obviously going to try to do anything to support you. Finding out your father isn’t who you thought and your mother has lied to you for years is not an  _ inconvenience.  _ Alexander considers you a close friend, of course he wants to be there for you in your time of need.” 

She nodded again. 

  
“What about you?” 

Magnus quirked an eyebrow and smiled at her, “What do you mean Biscuit?” 

Clary drew the corner of her bottom lip into her mouth, gnawing at the chapped skin of her lip. 

“From what I can understand; Valentine was the Shadow Worlds version of Hitler right? A special brand of evil. Killed Downworlders just because they differ from his ideal of ‘correct’. A man who, I’m willing to bet, killed many of those close to you? Probably even tried to kill you.” 

Magnus’ smile had faded at this point. 

“Yet here you are; offering your home, your kindness. To his  _ daughter _ .” She choked on the last word, her heart in her throat. She squeezed her eyes shut, breath stuttering from her mouth as she exhaled.

Clary’s eyes snapped open as she felt a warm hand encase her shaking one. She stared into the gentle eyes of Magnus Bane as he smiled at her. 

“Clary. I think I’m one of the only people in this world who can say with complete honesty: I understand how you feel. You may be his blood, his daughter, but you’re not him. You didn’t commit those atrocities, you are not to blame for anything he did. I’m not saying it wasn’t hard at the beginning when Jocelyn first came to see me, it was. However, I’m a grown Warlock and I can easily differentiate between the evil of Valentine and who you are as a person. The child will not be punished for the parents sin, after all.”

She opened her mouth, her next point poised on the tip of her tongue.

Her phone began to ring loudly. 

Magnus and Clary both jolted with shock, their eyes finding the buzzing phone on the table. The screen displaying Simon’s name. Clary gasped, eyes wide. 

“Simon! Oh no I completely forgot!” She hurried to answer the call, pressing it to her ear. 

“Clary Fray where the hell are you?” 

“Sim--”

“You’ve been missing all week, I’ve checked in with your mom and she’s just sitting around your apartment depressed!” 

“Don’t-” 

“And  _ now _ , I’ve tracked your phone to West Village but I can’t _ find you _ .”

Clary turned to Magnus, bringing the phone down from her ear and covering the mouthpiece with her palm. 

“Your wards, would they block a GPS?” At Magnus’ nod she sighed and spoke into the phone, ignoring her best friends frantic ranting, “We’ll come down for you Si.”

* * *

Simon Lewis was confused. 

He was confused a lot recently. His best friend had been distant ever since that night at Pandemonium. He had regretted letting her go home on her own the second he had watched her walk off, but that regret had strengthened after hearing her outlandish story about finding a dying man that had healed himself. When she had ran out of Saltwater Cafe he had followed her as quickly as he could, finding her speaking to the air in front of her. 

He’d been dismissed time and time again, his concerns being ignored and brushed off. His calls had been ignored and sent to voicemail multiple times. He was beyond concern at this point.

Earlier in the day he had decided he’d had enough, Simon had stormed his way over to the Fray’s household, finding Jocelyn; eye bags heavy and dark in a way that spoke of a particular brand of sleep deprivation. Red rimmed eyes filled to the brim with tears. He had barely been able to stutter out Clary’s name before a sob escaped Jocelyn’s mouth. 

He had shook with fear at what could have happened to Clary, desperation turning him towards the find my phone app he had installed when Clary had lost hers a few months ago. He’d followed it to the West Village. Nerves on edge as he walked past a sketchy looking alley way. 

He glanced down at his phone, coming to a stop in front of a high rise building. Apparently he was right next to the blinking dot that was Clary’s phone. He sighed heavily, and pressed down on the contact icon for Clary’s number. Hoping he would finally get through to her. 

When the call had been answered, he’d been ecstatic with relief. Ignoring Clary’s attempts at speech as he plowed ahead, his fears controlling his voice as word after word spilled out. He heard her saying something on the other end of the phone, before she interrupted him swiftly.

“We’ll come down to you Si.” She promptly hung up on him. 

He looked at the phone in his hand blank now the phone call had disconnected. 

“ _ We _ ?” 

To reiterate; Simon Lewis was  _ confused _ . 

* * *

Stood in the lavish apartment of a man he’d never met, staring at his best friend in her PJ's with her hair bundled in a messy bun Simon felt nothing but relief and an intense lack of certainty. 

Clary was fumbling with her phone in front of him, muttering about how she needed to call someone in for back up. The extremely handsome Asian man stood next to her had a hand on her shoulder and was whispering to her while staring at Simon coolly. Simon barely managed to hold back a sharp gasp at how attractive the man was. 

Her gaze snapped up, her eyes met Simon’s. She turned her head and nodded softly at the man. He stepped forward and offered a hand to Simon, 

  
“Magnus Bane. Solomon Lewis, correct?” 

Simon’s hand rose to meet Magnus’ shaking it in a slightly frantic way, “Simon, actually.” 

The other man just nodded absently, “Why don’t we sit Sherman? Biscuit just needs to make a quick phone call.” He led Simon to the sofa he and Clary had previously been occupying. 

“Would you like a drink?” At Simon’s nod Magnus made his way towards the drink cart that stood next to the sofa. “Anything in particular?” 

Simon shook his head, glancing over towards Clary as she spoke hurriedly into her phone. 

“Who’s she calling?” 

Magnus chuckled lightly, “You’ll see.” 

The chatter from the doorway stopped and Clary stumbled over to where Simon was sat, collapsing onto the floor by the glass table with extra flare. 

“Clary, what’s going on? Why aren’t you at come? Why are you here? How come your mom is so upset? Are you okay?” More questions poured from Simon’s mouth as he worried the glass he had been handed. 

Clary let out a panicked giggled as she looked at her friend having a meltdown. 

“Simon, I’m fine. I-I’m not the best person who can explain it though. I can explain my personal circumstances but before that,” She paused, “You’re going to need a whole lot of background information that I’m still shaky on myself.” 

“Will Alexander be along soon then?” Magnus asked from where he was still stood next to the drink cart. 

“He said he’d be as quick as he could. He sounded really tired and stressed.” 

“Clary, we talked about this.” 

“I know. I know.” 

Simon coughed awkwardly as he listened to their exchange. Two pairs of eyes snapped to look at him. 

“Simon I’m sorry, I-I’ve been going through something these past few weeks. I just haven’t been able to focus properly.” 

“Clary, I’m not angry! I’m just worried, I’ve missed you.” 

“I promise you Si, as soon as Alec gets here I’ll give you the explanation you deserve.” 

The room descended into a tense silence. The sun sank in the distance and the room became dark for a small moment. Simon watched as Magnus snapped his fingers and a number of lights and lamps flickered to life around the loft. 

Simon gaped at the simple but obvious display of magic, Magnus smiled sheepishly. 

After what felt like hours, but was truthfully barely one, a knock echoed through the apartment. 

Clary jumped to her feet eagerly, only to be stopped by Magnus. Patting her shoulders Magnus gestured her to the couch.    
  
“Stay here with your friend Biscuit. I’ll greet Alexander.” 

Clary chuckled lightly, “Have fun.” 

He waved her off and hurried to the entrance that Simon had come through an hour earlier. 

“Clary what’s going on?” 

She smiled at him, her eyes darting away from his guiltily. “It’s okay Simon.” 

A tired chuckle reverberated around the room as two sets of footsteps made their way into the living room. 

“Magnus, honestly I doubt his name is Saruman.” 

  
Simon turned his head toward the voices, and this time couldn’t contain the soft, “wow” that escaped him. 

Clary had obviously heard heard him, considering the snort that she let out. He whipped his head round to face her, eyes wide with shock. He jerked his head towards the doorway and back again. 

“Who?” he whispered. 

Clary smirked, “Simon Lewis, let me introduce you to Alec Lightwood.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know what you think! and as usual, let me know about any mistakes/or general thoughts you have! 
> 
> (also in case you didn't notice - i have NO CLUE how wards work ahsdk)


	7. New Frustrations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Simon gets an explanation, Alec is exhausted, Clary and Magnus belong to the 'Alec Lightwood Protection Squad' (jk they're the founders)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey-ho, 
> 
> Thanks to every single person who left me a kudos/comment, the support this fanfic gets is honestly so motivating. Sometimes I have doubts about my writing and seeing a new comment come in just - it really helps. THANKS AGAIN ILU 
> 
> The beginning of some sort of plot is ahead. (You've been warned asdjfk)

It wasn’t so much that Alec hated meeting new people, it was more that it was a  _ massive  _ inconvenience. It was the awkward conversations, the stilted questions that led nowhere, he strongly disliked it. 

He particularly  _ disliked  _ meeting new people who stared at him like Clary’s friend was. Simon was immediately recognisable thanks to how much Clary had spoken about her friend in the months they’d known each other. Alec honestly couldn’t count how many time Lewis had been brought up casually in conversation. It was to be expected; after all, they were childhood friends - it’s not unusual that Simon was in the majority of her stories. It was similar to how both Isabelle and Jace featured heavily in his. 

He knew how much Clary loved Simon. Realistically, Alec understood that he should put in some effort and make an attempt at being nice to the boy. However; the intense wide-eyed stare he was being levelled with was too much. He couldn’t stop himself from scowling in response. 

Hearing a soft "wow" leave the boys lips caused the scowl to deepen, and Magnus' chuckle at the slip up only made him feel worse.  _ Do I really look that tired? _ he thought. He took a steadying breath and turned to Clary; 

"What the  _ Hell  _ Fray?" 

At Clary’s guilty look and unsteady smile, he could already tell what the night would turn into. He wasn’t looking forward to explaining the Shadow World and it’s inner workings to another mundane, and this one was so clearly unlike Clary. The Sight nonexistent in the boy. Magnus had pulled him aside for a second once he had entered, and reminded him to lift the base glamour he almost always kept activated. Jokingly mentioning that reappearing in front of the boy could traumatise him. Alec had huffed, rolling his eyes and hadn’t been able to stop the tightness in his stomach that came from the light laugh his sarcastic actions had gotten from Magnus. 

"Simon… Simon found me. and now he needs an explanation and I can’t do it properly Alec! I’m so new to this. I don’t know what to do. Please? he deserves to know the secrets I've kept from him." 

Alec sighed heavily, while usually he would be opposed to informing a mundane of the Shadow World - he can see that it would be a bit hypocritical considering how easily he had divulged the information to Clary. He glanced out at Magnus out the corner of his eye, considering his easy posture. Magnus seemed pretty confident in allowing simon into the folds of the Shadow World. 

Alec took a moment, staring at Simon intensely- waiting to see if he would look away. Alec wasn’t a fool, he knew how intimidating he seemed to the untrained eye. When Simon refused to look away Alec snorted, nodding reluctantly he moved forward to perch on the coffee table in front of the sofa the two friends were currently occupying. 

He easily accepted the drink Magnus offered him, amber liquid sloshing in a short curved glass. He frowned at the slip of orange peel that had been placed by the ice in the drink. He cautiously took a quick sip and winced slightly at the flavour but smiled at Magnus regardless. 

Returning his gaze to Simon, he began to explain. 

"All the stories are true" 

As Alec explained, he couldn’t help but think it went smoother with Magnus behind him, chipping in when and where needed. The two bantered back and forth, joking about the stifling nature of Shadowhunters, and how ‘magical’ the Warlock’s were. Sly smiles exchanged whenever Simon, or even Clary, looked particularly confused. 

After what felt like hours, but was little more than half of one - the words came to a halt and silence fell over them all.

Simon sat gaping, staring at the unbelievably attractive men in front of him. 

Magnus had a wide smile on his face while Alec's remained in what Simon could only guess was his signature grimace. _T_ _ _alk_ about an impressive resting bitch face _ , Simon thought.

He turned his stare in Clary’s direction, who’s eyes had barely moved from him throughout the story. Clearly cautious, waiting for his reaction. 

"Simon?" She asked quietly. 

He sighed, 

"So, I guess you weren't lying about finding some guy bleeding out huh?" 

She huffed put out at the idea that he thought she was lying at all but had the start of a soft smile spreading across her face. 

"That would be that same _‘some guy_’." She replied jabbing her thumb in Alec’s direction. 

Neither Alec, nor Magnus were paying them much attention at this point though, their eyes only for each other as they talked in hushed voices by the drinks cart. Magnus gesturing dramatically at the array of drinks and syrups. Alec had a small smile on his face, shaking his head every now and then. Before He finally nodded at something that Magnus had said. 

Magnus’ face could only be described as triumphant as he began to aggressively mix a drink with undeniable flair. 

“So, what? You see him bleeding out, and then the next thing I know you’ve disappeared and Vampires and Werewolves are real? Ho-How did any of this happen Clary? How did the two of you become so close? And  _ why  _ was he bleeding out?”

“Are you gonna breathe anytime soon Si?” Clary joked. “We met up a few times for coffee, and one thing led to another and, he’s a good friend Simon. Once you get to know him you’ll see what I mean.” 

Simon scoffed quietly, muttering under his breath. 

“I don’t know about that, seems like a bit of a bitch to me.” 

Clary’s face creased with annoyance, and Magnus’ long, overenthusiastic description of the drink he had been making came to a stop as they all turned to look at Simon. Alec seemingly the only one unconcerned by the insult. He was even nodding in what looked like solid agreement. 

“Don’t call him that.” Clary scolded, “He’s done a lot for me these past few weeks. I don’t appreciate you calling him that.” 

Alec sighed heavily, eyes rolling again as he returned to his place on the coffee table. A completely different drink in his hand, this one he was clearly enjoying. 

“I was on patrol that night.” 

At three confused looks he shook his head. He took an easy sip of his drink, carefully maneuvering around the slice of pineapple perched on the side of his glass. The ice clinking loudly in the pink concoction as the others waited for him to continue. 

“You asked why I was bleeding, in that alleyway right?” Simon nodded carefully, “Well I was on patrol. That’s one thing Shadowhunters are responsible for; patrolling for demons or rifts where demons could potentially come through. That night, Jace and Izzy-” 

Simon let out a confused sound, and Alec sighed again. 

“My siblings. Jace and Izzy had decided that they didn’t feel up to patrolling, so I went out on my own. Yes - it’s as dumb as it sounds. I went alone because if anyone found out about them skipping out there would be hell to pay”    
  
Clary scowled, “Where did they go instead?” 

Alec hummed at her in question, 

“Where’d they go Alec? They weren’t still at the Institute because otherwise they would have been easily caught out. So?” 

“I-I don’t know what you want me to say Clary, they went clubbing.” 

“So you ended up injured in a fucking alleyway - and they were  _ partying _ .”

Alec shook his head, “You’re making it into a bigger thing then it is Clary. If it had been a usual night I wouldn’t have had a problem, but - I stumbled upon a couple of Raum demons.” 

Magnus’ horrified gasp echoed through the loft, 

“Alexander. Raum demons? No wonder you were injured.” 

“What are Raum demons?” Clary asked. 

Magnus’ eyes were dark with tension as he answered her question.

“They’re one of the more clever demon classes. About the size of an average human but with tentacles for arms and they have this horrifyingly pallid, scaly skin. Their eyes bulge, pitch black and pupil-less. They’re terrifying and mostly used to retrieve things - or  _ people _ , for whomever summoned them.” 

All eyes turned to the exhausted form of Alec. His eyes had begun to slide shut and his drink was dipping from his hand as his wrist began to go limp. His eyes snapped open forcefully when he realised Magnus’ had stopped talking. His eyes lazily focused on the three of them once more as he hummed softly in askance. 

“Alexander, if they were after you-” Magnus paused, “If someone sent them after you. You could be in real danger.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	8. Another Alleyway

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh Simon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's short but it's an update, sorry about the mini hiatus but I got a comment that sorta, discouraged me aha - hope you enjoy this :)

Simon stumbled away from the imposing structure of flats as he attempted to wrap his head around everything he had learned. Warlocks, Werewolves,  _ Vampires _ . All of them real? He couldn't believe it, this should be every nerdy fanboy dream he's ever had come true. Instead he wanted to turn around and storm back into the apartment he had left moments ago - and demand they rescind what they had just said, take back his changed view of the world. 

He shook his head to dislodge himself of those thoughts - forgetting this would be no good for anyone; he had to help Clary in any way possible. She was refusing to talk to her mother, so she needed someone to lean on. He paused briefly and nodded, determination renewed. He would head home and do some basic research - surely the internet would reveal some viable results.

The cold winter wind of New York bit at his skin with a vengeance as he jogged away from his best friends place of residence. He allowed his thoughts to drift back to Jocelyn, wondering how she was currently dealing with everything. It had been described to him as if she had known about the whole thing the entire time. He loses his train of thought as he stuttered to an abrupt stop, noticing a vaguely human shaped figure slumped at the end of the alley way he had been about to walk through. 

He took a tentative step forward, concern causing his eyebrows to furrow together. 

“H-Hello?” Taking a deep breath he began to walk further into the alley, hand skimming over the bricks to guide his way. As he walked he was able to see the figure more clearly. The haunched form was a dark haired woman, blood painted almost her entire being - her head bent forward, hair covering her face. The light that had been previously illuminating his way flickered briefly before dying, shrouding the entire area in darkness. 

"H-hey. you okay?" 

His hand reached forward, moving to touch her shoulder. After a moment without response he gently pushed her head back so it lay against the wall. Her aristocratic features reminded him of the man back in Magnus Bane’s apartment, sharp cheekbones and thick eyelashes brushing against her cheeks. 

She was  _ beautiful _ , from what little he could see of her face. Her dark clothing left little to the imagination, extenuating her cleavage in a sophisticated but sultry way. He couldn’t help but think of the story Clary had told him, of her meeting with that  _ Shadowhunter.  _ Maybe that's what this was, maybe he was about to experience his own life changing meeting. 

"Excuse me?" he whispered.

He couldn’t help but spare another glance to the woman's face, entranced by her beauty, the light above him flickered back to life, the light allowed him to take her in fully. He gasped slightly, hands quivering as he reached out, brushing the tips of his fingers against the lower half of her face. He brought them back towards him, taking in the fresh blood that stained his fingers. As he took in a breath, he shook slightly. His mouth creased into a frown. The blood staining her face wasn’t as old as the dried blood on her clothes, he looked closer, looking for her injuries. He moved to touch where the blood stain seemed to be the worst, pressing down slightly on her abdomen. 

Before he could move his hand to inspect any further a delicate looking hand wrapped around his wrist. The grip painfully tight as he attempted to pull back. He was tugged roughly into the personal space of the woman. 

“W-wh..” 

As he stared into the woman's dead eyes, he saw a wicked smile begin to spread over her face. 

\-- 

Clary glared unhappily at the morning sun shining in through Magnus’ wide windows, her eyes squinting against the light. She turned sullenly towards the kitchen, shuffling in; stopping short as she took in the sight of Magnus and Alec, sitting together. She smiled, happy with her situation for a moment, before she remembered the conversation she’d had with Simon the night before. Her smile fading as she recalled how he had basically ran from the loft.

They had tried to persuade him to stay, feeling he was vulnerable after the revelation of all his movie fantasies being real, but he had been firm in his decision to return home. 

She shook her head to dislodge her saddened thoughts, Luke was visiting today. Checking up on her, the most likely reason. She hadn’t spoken to him since everything had been revealed to her so she hoped he would be open to answering some of the harder and more personal questions. 

“Morning Biscuit! Have you heard anything from Salmon yet?” Magnus’ cheery voice cut through her thoughts easily - she smiled at him, bringing her hand up to let her hair down from its extremely messy bun, shaking it out before pulling it back into a much neater pony. She slid her phone out from the pockets on her pj bottoms, immediately seeing a notification from Simon prominent on the screen, announcing his arrival back home. She dropped it carelessly onto the counter top as she crawled into a seat there. 

“He said he got home fine and he’d message me later.” 

Alec nodded as he stood, pushing his hands against the counter as he pushed back. 

“Good. Try to keep him out of trouble. The last thing I need is another mundane causing me grief on top of everything else.” He glared at Clary, the smirk on his face diminishing the effect of his usually stone cold look. 

She ignored him, sticking out her tongue at him as he passed her. Alec ignored her, sending a smile Magnus’ way as he magicked a very sweet but strong coffee into his hands. 

  
“We  _ will  _ be talking about the Raum demon at some point by the way Alexander.” 

Clary nodded enthusiastically at Mangus’ words; “Yeah,  _ Alexander _ .” She snickered, “Don’t think you can get away with not telling us you’re in danger!” 

Alec’s back stiffened before he nodded jerkily - hurrying to escape before an interrogation could begin. 

  
  



	9. Meetings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Simon's in trouble, as is Alec & Luke and Clary talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wowzers lads I'm back! 
> 
> With everything going on I've had my hours cut at work, so while that's nasty for my financially, creatively it's great!! 
> 
> So enjoy!

His eyes fluttered as he tried to force them open. 

He couldn't focus. Nothing seemed real. A thick fog clouded his thoughts. 

Finally he was able to fully wrench his eyes open, his pupils darting around as he tried to take in his surroundings. 

His breathing, heavy and uneven, the only sound he could hear beyond the consistent drip of an unknown liquid somewhere in his vicinity. 

Where was he? 

Why was it so  _ cold _ ? 

He couldn't remember how he got here. He couldn't. If he could just,  _ remember _ .

He could just barely recall his and Clary's conversation - he thinks he left Magnus Bane's home.

How did he get here? Wherever  _ here _ was. 

He shook. Overwhelmed with pure fear. 

Simon Lewis definitely wasn't unfamiliar with fear - but he had never experienced it with such great intensity. 

He could feel the blood pulsing in his veins, his heart racing. His chest rattled as he attempted to breathe deeply to calm some of his anxiety. 

He felt like the already small room was shrinking in on him. 

In the darkness of his prison, Simon felt his face become wet under the strength of his tears. He just wanted to know where he was. 

He had no means of knowing how much time had passed since he had woken up in this room. He didn't know how long he had been unconscious for. 

Were people looking for him? Surely- Surely  _ someone _ was. Clary would become worried when she doesn't receive a text informing of his safe arrival home. 

Right? Although, she had looked tired - she might have fallen asleep immediately after he had left. 

Or maybe she had been distracted by the other two. Maybe. Maybe she didn't care now she had others in her life. 

Simon shook his head, he couldn't let himself think like that. 

His mom, maybe she would be concerned when she looked in on him before work - except she hadn't done that in years. 

His sister? No she had her own stuff to deal with, and even if she noticed, wouldn't she just assume he was with Clary? 

An almost inaudible sob escaped him as he realised that it was entirely likely that no one was coming for him. 

Footsteps. Voices. A key turning in a lock. The door being yanked open with impressive force. 

Simon snapped towards the person who had opened the door, gasping in shock at the smile on the man's face - fangs hanging over his bottom lip. 

"Look who's up!" 

* * *

Alec sighed, letting his head thud heavily back onto the window of the subway car. The endless motion gave him a moment of escape from the overwhelming noise of commuting New Yorkers. 

He closed his eyes tightly and berated himself for letting the truth about the demon attack slip. 

He just hadn't thought it was important, there was likely a completely logical explanation. He had probably interrupted their true hunt, after all - he was just Alec, no one significant in the grand scheme of things - who would be after him?

Straightening as he felt the train come to a halt at his stop, he began making his way back to the Institute. His head pounding already with the thought of the issues he may encounter after his unexpected night out. 

He surprisingly wasn't faced with anyone as he entered, no sign of Izzy or Jace - which he was absolutely taking as a blessing. Even after the good night's sleep he got yesterday, he didn't feel mentally prepared for another conflict with his siblings. He hummed a soft tune to himself as he headed towards the training room, determined to begin his daily routine when he was interrupted by a sharp cough. 

Unfortunately recognising the cough his eyes clenched shut as he readied himself for the berating he was about to receive. Alec turned slowly to face his mother, unsurprised to see her mouth set in a familiar angry sneer. 

"Where have you been?" 

"I was-" 

"Do you have any idea how irresponsible it is for you to go  _ gallivanting _ off in the middle of the night? I'd like to say I expected better from you," 

Her chuckle lacked any actual humour, 

"But that would be a lie wouldn't it?" 

Alec nodded tightly, his eyes straying from his mother to stare off into the distance, ready to allow this usual dressing down happen. He saw Izzy and Jace loitering in the background, watching with matching frowns on their faces.

"Mom I-" 

" _ Do not _ think you can interrupt me when I'm talking to you! I'm sick of your behaviour Alexander. You're meant to be a good role model for your siblings instead here you are, being even more of a disappointment than usual." 

Alec flinched, the words hitting as harshly as they were intended to. She lent forward and grabbed his arm in a harsh grip. Pulling him so his ear was closer to her mouth,

"If you don't start controlling your  _ urges _ ," She spat the word like it was a disease, "I'll have you sent back to Idris so you can't embarrass our name any more than you already have." 

Releasing him from her grip she turned and stormed away from him. 

Alec took a shuddering breath, his teeth grinding together as he attempted to contain his reaction to the humiliation his mother had just put him through. He reluctantly looked in the direction of his siblings - as they tried to walk towards him. Presumably to comfort him. He held up a slightly shaking hand and waved them off. 

He needed to be alone. 

* * *

Luke stood in front of a large set of doors, slightly intimidated by the sheer power of the presence he could feel behind them.

He had come into contact with Magnus Bane a number of times, each time he had been blown away by how powerful and respected the Warlock was, and now the girl he saw as a daughter was acquainted with the Warlock. At least he could be sure she was safe. 

He was shaken from his thoughts as the door in front of him shot open, he had just a second to curse himself for allowing himself to be distracted - before he had the bright red hair of Clary shoved into his face as she clung to him in what could loosely be described as a hug, but was really her clinging to him like a dramatic limpet. 

"Luke! Magnus said you were here! Why are you just standing outside?" She began to pull him inside. He offered very little resistance, used to Clary's insistent tugging. 

"Lucian!" Magnus Bane was just as regal as he had been the last time they had met. 

"Mr Bane, thank you for welcoming me into your home." 

"Nonsense Lucian, it's not as if we're strangers! Call me Magnus." 

Clary and Luke settled onto comfortable sofas, Magnus wandering to the drinks cart, offering them a variety of drinks. 

Clary giggled slightly, "Deja Vu!" 

Luke glanced at her, confused by the outburst but Magnus smiled and nodded faintly. 

After Magnus had joined them, lounging on his own chair - Luke turned to Clary. He grabbed for her hands, pulling them into a firm but still gentle grip. 

"Clary, I have so much I want to talk to you about. I don't even know if it can all be said in one sitting."

She nodded at him encouragingly, and he took a breath and began. 

His words; desperate and hopeful, full of the want to convince his daughter that he hadn't wanted to be complicit in what her mother had done - but he also had tried to understand where Joceyln had been coming from.

He told her everything he physically could, detailing his own time in Valentine's inner circle, when he had been bitten and how his  _ Parabatai  _ had reacted negatively. Luke spoke for hours, telling her about his regrets and his love for her mother. How Jocelyn had escaped with Clary, and he hadn't seen them for years until they had been reunited in New York and had from then on had never thought twice about the decision to stay with them. 

She listens with wide-eyed curiosity, squeezing his hand softly whenever the words stuttered and became too hard to speak aloud. 

As his story comes to an end he looks at her with haunted but love filled eyes, 

"Clary, I need you to understand- I never wanted you to find out this way. I wanted your mom to tell you, I'm sorry you found out like this before I could tell you." 

Clary squeezed his hand once more, smiling at him tightly. "I understand Luke, I- I'm not even that angry anymore, I'm just - upset." 

" _ Parabatai _ " She said. Luke looked at her, his eyebrows risen, trying to understand why she had decided to question in that particular part of the story. 

"Alec has one of those, right?" Clary said to Magnus, after he had nodded she turned to face Luke, "What is a ' _ Parabatai' _ ?" She emphasized the word by using air quotes.

"I suppose it's like a soulmate, you share part of your soul with another person. More technically though it's an oath bound pair of Shadowhunters who pledge to fight together as lifelong partners…" He paused, inhaling harshly. 

"It's someone who you're willing to lay down your life for. Someone you would both die and kill for." 

At Clary's uncertain nod, he clicked his tongue nervously. 

"Clary, can I.. Do you mind if I ask? When are you planning to return home?"

Clary pulled her hands away from where they had been clasped in his for the duration of Luke's tale, tucking them together in her lap. 

"I can't say Luke, after finding out what mom did… I just don't know. I'm still so upset." 

"That's okay! You're allowed to be upset Clary. Maybe we could set up a meeting? Like the one we just had? Somewhere you feel comfortable, and you could both talk this out?" 

Clary glanced up from her lap, where her nails had been digging into the soft flesh of her thigh, and nodded. 

"Yeah. That sounds like a good idea." 

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not amazing but I did enjoy writing it so I hope you enjoy reading it! 
> 
> Once again if u notice anything wrong please let me know!! I couldnt find anything about when Magnus and Luke met so I??? improvised??? Send me sources if u know anything! 
> 
> And the Parabatai thing made me wanna rip my HAIR out it took me ages to figure out how to word it urgh.


	10. An Important Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some important changes in the lives of our heroes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An important change in the story, I wasn't entirely sure how to handle this so I hope I did my idea justice! Let me know about any mistakes made. 
> 
> I was very nervous writing this urgh.

The knock that echoed through the loft disturbed Magnus from the potion he had been focusing on for the last twelve hours. He paused his stirring, the inaction causing the entire concoction to turn a hideous shade of mauve. He let out a frustrated puff of air and rubbed at his temples - attempting to sooth away his headache. Too much was happening in his life right now, and visitors at - he checked his watch -  _ 3am  _ was the last thing he needed. 

He cleared his throat loudly as he made his way towards the door, where the person behind it had continued their knocking unhindered. He gestured elegantly with his hand, the doors flying open with magnificent flare;

**“Who ** ** _dares_ ** ** disturb the High War- ** _ Raphael _ ! Dear Heart, how nice of you to visit! Who’s your clearly intoxicated friend?” 

Raphael shrugged his shoulders to hoist the limp man higher up, allowing a glimpse at his face and the blood that covered his entire form. 

“ _ Simon?”  _ Clary exclaimed, voice pitched higher than usual as she rushed over, clearly having been woken up by the noise. She pawed hopelessly at his face, trying to get him to focus his eyes on her for more than a second. 

She glared up at Raphael, rage clear in her eyes as she demanded to know who he was and where he had found her best friend. 

Raphael scoffed at her, dismissing her immediately he looked back to Magnus. “So can I put him down somewhere or are we just letting him bleed out in the doorway?” 

Clary tried to grab back the attention of both men as he pushed past her huffing when she was ignored once more. She whipped out her phone, and sent a quick  _ ‘SOS’  _ out to Alec, knowing he’d most likely still be awake and join her. She knew it was late but surely he’d understand the importance of the situation. 

Sliding the phone back into her pajama pocket she hurriedly followed the worrying trail of blood into the guest bedroom across from hers.

Bursting into the room, she first noticed the intimidating man who had brought Simon to them stood in one corner of the room, an impressive scowl on his face as he watched Magnus run his magic infused hands over Simon’s prone body. She paused, watching Magnus work his literal magic. 

She worried her lip anxiously as she stared at the vulnerable body of her oldest friend. Her mind struggled to associate the man in front of her with the boy she had grown up with. Clary thought back to the texts he had sent her throughout the week. She had been so preoccupied with her own issues that she hadn’t taken much notice of the one worded responses from him. 

_ I should have paid more attention,  _ she thought.  _ I should have checked up on him.  _

Her eyes filled with tears as she listened to his pained whimpers and heavy breathing.

She covered her mouth with her hand, gasping into it sharply as Simon threw his head back with a loud scream, that was ended with a dangerous sounding cough as blood spewed from his mouth. 

“W-What happened?” She asked the man who had delivered Simon to them, “Why is he  _ like that _ ?” 

The man glared at her for a second, before his gaze softened after taking in her slumped posture and her clear distress. 

“He was taken by my clan leader when he was leaving this building a week ago.” 

She whimpered softly when she heard that Simon had been gone for an entire week.

Magnus’ hands paused, his magic flaring a bright red for a second. 

“Camille did this?” He clenched his eyes shut. 

At Raphael’s reluctant nod, he sighed and continued to work on Simon. 

“What does that  _ mean _ ?” 

“It means that Raphael’s clan leader has broken the Accords.” 

At the sound of Alec’s voice Clary turned and threw herself at him, her head buried into his shoulder as she tried to stifle her sobs. Alec wrapped an arm around Clary’s back as he continued to look at Raphael. 

“Lightwood.” 

“Santiago.” 

“Alexander. I’m glad you’re here, could you take Clary into the front room while I finish looking at Simon?” 

Alec nodded easily, steering Clary out of the room - shushing her quiet protests as they cropped up. He led her to the main sofa, pushing her down softly, before disappearing into the kitchen - returning minutes later with steaming mugs of tea. He handed one to her before sitting next to her. 

They sat in silence for what felt like hours, minutes sluggishly passing as they listened to the painful noises that filled the loft.

Clary shook more intensely with every noise. Her hands clenching around her now empty mug.

“What does this mean for Simon?” She asked after a few quiet moments. 

Alec took a moment, before taking Clary’s mug and setting both of theirs down on the table in front of them, using the action as a distraction to gain a few precious seconds to consider how to answer. 

“Depending on how deep his wounds are, how.” He sighed, “How life-threatening they are. He could be fine and just need a few days of recovery. Or-” He paused. 

Clary looked up at him, tears streaking down her face. “ _ Or _ ?”

Alec pressed his hand onto her shoulder in an attempt at comfort, his face creasing with sympathy; “Or- He could die.” 

She let out a choked sob, her shaking hand rushing up to her mouth and she hunched over with the weight of the words. 

“Don’t mince your words do you Lightwood? Why don’t you tell the little girl about the  _ other  _ option?” 

Clary’s head whipped up, fury blazed on her face - her bright orange hair reminiscent of fire in the dim lights in the loft. “I’m not a  _ little girl.  _ My name is Clary, and unless you have something important to say why don’t you  _ shut the fuck up _ .” 

At Alec’s snort she turned to face him, her anger aimed at him,    
  


“What does he mean, ‘other option’?” 

Alec’s mouth pursed together, clear disapproval written across his face. 

“Clary-” 

“Just tell me Alec.” 

“He’s been bitten by vampires Clary, from what Raphael says for almost a week. If he dies from his injuries - he has the chance to come back as a Vampire. There are other steps of course. Dangerous steps, but it could happen. If that’s what he wanted. He wouldn’t die because he would be immortal.”

“Then he’ll be fine! He’ll be okay.” Clary shot at Raphael. “Go do that. Do the other steps! Save him!” 

“Clary it’s not something Raphael can just do.” 

“Can’t I give Raphael permission to ‘turn him’? I’m his  _ best friend. _ Surely I can give permission?” 

“Clary. That’s not how this works. I understand that this is a horrible situation but you need to calm down a little. Take deep breaths. Simon isn’t dead yet, we don’t know if he’s going to die. He could be fine, and even if he doesn’t make it - that isn’t your decision. Becoming a Vampire isn't something that another person can choose for you. It’ll change his entire life.” 

“How can he make that decision himself if he’s  _ dying _ ?”

“I could wake him up for a few minutes.” Magnus spoke as he entered the room, his hands bright with blood. “I don’t believe Simon will make it without the change. The damage is too extensive. I’m not as skilled in healing as some of my colleagues and by the time they could get here-” He trailed off. “I can wake him up, he’ll be in an immense amount of pain - but he will be able to make the choice for himself.” 

He looked at Clary, his entire demeanor serious.

“But Clary. If he doesn’t want to go through the transformation - you have to accept that. This is his life that’s about to change.” 

She nodded stiffly, she stood.

“I want to be there when you wake him up. If he wants to pass on, I- I’d like to say goodbye.” She choked on the last word, waiting for Magnus’ nod before she swept past him, determination obvious in her stride. Raphael glanced at Magnus and Alec before following after her with a smirk. 

Magnus grinned tiredly at Alec, “Why Alexander, what a joy to find you in my house at this time of night once more. Although not under circumstances that I would have preferred.” 

Alec huffed, amused and embarrassed; “About that, sorry for just barging in. When Clary sent that text - I thought someone had broken in or one of you was hurt, so I didn’t want to waste time by waiting outside.” 

“Nonsense, you are always most welcome. Now, I believe I need to awaken this boy and change his life forever.” He left the room with a sad smile. 

Now alone in the main room Alec allowed himself a second to deflate. His shoulders slumped forward and he brought up his hands to cup his face and he took a few shaky breaths. 

He’d been running on fumes for the past few days, his stamina rune the only thing keeping him going at this point. The confrontation with his mother a few days earlier was heavy on his mind. Her words a constant source of anxiety and pain. He hadn’t slept well since that day, working solidly to try and prove that he had at least some worth to her and The Institute. 

He had finished the last of his paperwork when the text from Clary had arrived, shaking him to his very core. The panic he had felt at the lack of information had made his mind up quickly. He had rushed from The Institute carelessly, barely taking the time to glamour himself as he had activated his speed rune and ran towards the loft. 

He knew because of his actions he would be the victim of another hatred filled conversation with his mother when he finally made his way back ‘home’ after this was all dealt with. He heaved a sigh, and brought his hands down to rest in front of him, picking at his knuckles with his nails anxiously. He pushed his feelings aside at a sudden burst of noise from the guest bedroom Simon had been placed in, rushing to follow the others. 

As he entered the room, he made note of the fact that the mundane was now sat propped up slightly, his face contorted with pain, his breaths gasping and desperate. Simon nodded, fear prominent in his eyes, before Magnus pressed a palm to his head and he fell back into an almost peaceful looking slumber. Magnus turned to Raphael, nodding sharply. 

“Now we wait.” 

  
  


* * *

Minutes ticked by, Simon’s breathing choppy and harsh. His lips wet with blood. His already alabaster skin; waxy against the moonlight that lit the room. Nimble fingers gently moved his fringe; tacky with blood and sweat, away from his eyes 

As soon as Magnus had promised that no further pain would be caused by her sitting next to him - Clary had claimed a seat on the bed. She had grasped his hand tightly, pulling it into her lap as she tried to stay as calm as she could. Her eyes shone with unspilled tears, she picked anxiously at the loose skin on her bottom lip - tugging on it with her fingernail, causing the skin to split and a dribble of blood to leak down her chin. She licked at it, trying to sooth the sharp sting. 

Alec stood nearby, conversing quietly with Magnus and Raphael near the door. His eyes wandered over to Clary regularly, his concern obvious on his face. 

Simon’s breathing stuttered sharply, his blood filled lungs causing his chest to heave as he tried to inhale. His last breath synced with Clary’s short wail of grief. The hand that she had been gripping fell to the stained sheets as she got to her feet and stumbled away from the bed that held the lifeless form of Simon Lewis. 

Raphael came forward, dipping to pick Simon up. With a hand under Simon’s knees and the other across his back, Raphael turned and left the apartment. Clary lurched, a small attempt at following, only to be stopped by Alec’s firm grip. 

Clary ripped herself away from him, backing into the wall furthest away from the door. Her hand dipped into her shirt - tugging out the gaudy friendship necklace that Simon had presented her when they had been much younger. Her fingers tugged on it as she slid down the wall and pulled her knees to her chest. Her head dipped forward. 

She could feel her heart pounding in her ears, sweat dripping down her neck as she shook violently - the fingers on her other hand digging into the flesh of her throat as she struggled to breathe. 

Alec knelt in front of Clary, his hands tight on her arms as he looked into her eyes. He took her shaking hand and placed it on his chest - taking a deep breath he nodded at Clary and began to count slowly to ten. Clary followed his wordless instructions and began trying to breath with Alec. After a few endless moments, Clary’s chest untightened slowly and she nodded when Alec bunched his eyebrows in concern. 

He spoke in the softest tone she had ever heard from him, 

“Clary. I know it doesn’t seem like it right now, but eventually it will be okay. Raphael will take care of it. He’ll take care of Simon, let’s get you to bed.” 

He tugged her up, and she nodded listlessly, pausing to hug Magnus where he was standing by the doorway as she let Alec to guide her into the room. He went to enter with her, only to be rebuked by a hand on his chest. Looking down at he smiled tentatively. 

“Okay. Call me if you need me.” 

The door shut with a delicate thud. 

Alec sighed, rubbing his eyes in an attempt to rid himself of the bone shattering exhaustion he felt. 

“Are you staying the night darling?” Magnus asked. 

Alec smiled at the offer, before shaking his head softly. 

“I wish I could, but I have a meeting at 7:30. If I run back now I can probably get a few hours of sleep.”

Magnus frowned at him, “Are you sure you wouldn’t like a portal Alexander?” 

“There’s no need to worry Magnus. You’ve used enough of your magic today. I’ll be fine running back.” 

“At least allow me to escort you to the door?” 

Alec’s smile widened, a flush spreading down his neck. “If you insist.” 

They took their time making their way to the doors, silence their companion. Magnus opened the door for Alec and waved him off as he jogged his way down the many flights of stairs. 

Alec sighed as he checked his watch. 

_ 05:30 _

If he was lucky he might be able to get a couple of hours sleep before he had to be up and ready for his meeting. 

He pushed his way out of the doors of Magnus’ building, becoming immediately drenched from the unexpected downpour. 

He sighed. 

Better start walking. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone's okay!! The whole situation going on right now is tough so I'm sending my love to everyone <3 
> 
> Thanks to everyone for their kudos, bookmarks, comments EVERYTHING!!! I'm going to have a go at replying to everyone now but just know if I don't manage it I appreciate you all very much <3
> 
> I did a bunch of research into Shadowhunter's vampires for this chapter, I didn't end up using a lot of it because I got so distracted by the wiki aha. (It was the book wiki and boyhowdy can i say im glad i never read past a certain book aha not to judge anyone that likes them just dear god as a queer person i cannot STAND how alec was treated as a character in the book but thats just my opinion tbh)


	11. Training

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clary meets up with her mom but things go wrong. Jace and Alec have a... let's say conversation. Clary and Alec have a chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! (and I have two chapters behind me this time so I'm gonna post this one and then you guys will definitely have a chapter next week as well!) 
> 
> Hope everybody's staying safe during these times <3

Clary stared out at the streets of New York, her time cooled coffee clutched in her hand. She picks absent-mindedly at the cardboard that wrapped around the cup. Jocelyn Fray sits slumped in the chair opposite, her eyes focused completely on her daughter. 

The silence that engulfed them was nothing short of uncomfortable. 

Clary had finally caved and returned her mother's calls the day after the night of Simon’s ‘turning’. While Alec and Magnus had been an amazing support system, neither knew Simon and as such couldn’t give her the reassurance she needed. 

A week later she answered one of her mom’s calls, desperate to talk to someone who knew Simon as she did, and here she was. It was awkward, she couldn’t figure out how to begin the conversation. They’d sat there for forty-five minutes, various attempts at conversation having failed, Clary could admit she wasn’t being the most amicable person in regards to her mother - but really, why should she make this easy?

Clary sighed as she let her thoughts wander, her mind drifting towards Simon’s current situation. As far as she knew Simon was fine, at least - that’s what she’d been told by Magnus. She was having trouble coming to terms with what this all meant. Simon - her friend a vampire? It seemed impossible, sure knowledge about the Shadow World was one thing - but seeing Simon ripped up and bleeding like that had been  _ different _ . She needed to see him, to talk to him but hadn’t been allowed to. 

Alec had done his best to explain, his words comforting but stilted as he tried to convey to her what Simon’s new way of life would entail. He’d even teamed up with Magnus at one point, having him explain the more nuanced issues that he couldn’t fully grasp due to his Shadowhunter upbringing - but nothing could make it sink in. She felt - lost. 

She had hoped that by meeting up with her mother, the familiarity would help ease her - so far that hadn’t worked. She just felt more off-kilter, the uncomfortable atmosphere making her feel worse. 

“Clary?” Her mom’s voice ripped violently through her thoughts, “I just want to thank you for meeting up with me. I know that you’re still very angry and frustrated, so you giving me this chance means a lot to me.” 

Clary finally allowed her stare to move away from the people walking past the window, her gaze falling to her mom’s hopeful expression. 

“I love you, mom. Just because I’m angry doesn’t mean that stopped.” 

“I know Clary, but not having you at home has been hard. I just - It doesn’t matter. Are you comfortable at Magnus’ place? Are you happy?” 

“Yes mom, I’m happy and comfortable. I do miss home though.”. 

Her mom pounced on the last half of her sentence, “If you miss home you can always move back sweetie! I haven’t touched your room at all!” 

Clary shook her head, smiling softly; “I don’t think I’m ready for that yet, but soon.” 

Jocelyn grimaced, her hopeful expression melting from her face, “When Clary? I understand that you wanted space but you barely know Magnus - he’s a great man, I know that but surely you’d feel more comfortable with Simon? Or Luke! I know you’ve talked to him recently, he’d be more than happy to have you with him.” 

Her mentioning Simon made Clary flinch back. She hadn’t told her mom what had happened; thinking that the news would be best delivered in person - after all, her mom considered Simon a pseudo-son, he’d been in their lives that long. She steeled herself. Her mom deserved to know what had happened. 

“Mom. About Simon.” 

“Oh, have you seen him recently? He came by the other day; asking for you, I didn’t tell him where you were, I had no idea how to explain after all - but I’m glad he managed to contact you!” She seemed so genuinely happy at the idea of her and Simon talking, Clary almost couldn’t bring herself to tell her the truth. 

“He found me, mom, at Magnus’, we told him about the Shadow World-” 

“Clary! Of all the irresponsible things you could have done! I know he’s your best friend, but to tell him about our... that world? You’ve put him in danger, I know what he’s like, he’s so curious he won’t be able to help himself. He'll actively search out the things you’ve told him about!” 

“Mom-” 

“No Clary! I can’t  _ believe  _ that Lightwood or Magnus would allow you to do this! Have you talked to Simon since you saw him? He could have already started looking into what he shouldn’t. We need to contact him-” 

“He’s a  _ vampire!” _ Clary’s raised voice earned them a number of judgemental looks, she huffed and turned her gaze back to the cardboard on her cup, scratching at it viciously. 

“A- A vampire?” Her mom’s face was like chalk, her mouth hung open slightly. “When? What- Clary, what happened?” 

Clary shakily took a breath and began to detail to her mom what had happened the previous week. She refused to look at her mom as she recounted the incident, she told her about the blood, about how Alec had rushed to her side and helped her through it - how Raphael had carried Simon away to bury him. 

When she had finished she looked up at her mom, tears had begun to fall during her story but she brushed them away harshly as she saw the look on her mom's face. 

“Mom?” 

Her mom startled out of her still state, her mouth snapping shut loudly. 

“Clary, you need to stay away from him.” 

“What?”

“He’s a monster now, he won’t be able to control himself, you’ll get hurt.” 

“He’s- He’s not a  _ monster!  _ He’s Simon!” 

“Clary. You don’t understand, you don’t understand this  _ world  _ you’ve been thrust into. Did your Shadowhunter not tell you anything? Did he not tell you about the dangers?” 

“Yes. Alec told me what could happen, and how Simon’s life would change - but none of that makes Simon a monster!” 

“Clary-” 

“No.” She jumped up from her seat, which wobbled dangerously as it was thrust away from her with the movement, “I’m not listening to this. I’m not listening to you spread  _ bullshit! _ ”

Jocelyn quickly followed her to her feet, grabbing Clary’s wrist. 

“Clary wait. Please.” 

“I’ll call you mom, but I can’t talk to you anymore today.” 

With that Clary turned and stormed from the coffee shop, ignoring the pleading looks of her mother and the confused stares of the other customers. 

  
  


Alec grunts as he’s again thrown to the floor by his  _ Parabatai _ . They’d been training for a few hours now, friendly spars that had ended the same way every time because of how distracted he had been. 

He laid on the floor, exhausted and done with life. He’d been sleeping a little better recently, now that his mother had finally gone back to Idris, but he still struggled with juggling his siblings, his duties, and his ‘secret life’ with Clary and Magnus. 

_ Magnus _ . 

The Warlock was the main reason he had been so distracted today. They’d been conversing over the phone regularly for the past few days, it had started with Magnus ringing to keep him updated on Simon’s situation, and how Clary had been handling it - but as the phone calls went on they’d drifted to more personal conversational topics, never anything to do with their duties. Just, idle chats - about things that weren’t necessarily important, but were fun nonetheless. 

The more they talked the more Alec grew to appreciate having someone like Magnus to talk to. He loved his siblings and he was growing to adore Clary, as troublesome as she could be sometimes - but there was something about Magnus, about how free he was, how open he could be about  _ everything  _ \- that was refreshing - he never reprimanded Alec for being quiet or for struggling to make easy conversation. He never pried where he knew he wouldn’t be welcome. 

For once Alec had someone who respected his boundaries and he - he really appreciated that. 

He more than appreciated it, Magnus was amazing, and he was a great friend. 

Therefore, Alec theorised, it’s no surprise that he had developed the  _ tiniest  _ of crushes on the man. 

After all, this was Magnus Bane, who wouldn’t have a crush on him after having his attention? 

“You okay man?” 

His thoughts were interrupted by a very sweaty Jace standing over him, his head tilted with mild concern. 

“Are you still tired? I’ve never seen you go down so easily!” He stuck out his hand, waggling it in Alec’s face. 

Alec batted it away easily, pushing himself up on his own. 

“I’m just a bit worn out.” 

“A bit?” 

“Oh shut it dog-food face.” 

Jace shook his head at the childish insult, the cheeky smile plastered on his face began to fade as he looked at Alec. Taking in the bags underneath his eyes, and the redness of his eyes. 

“I’m serious Alec. Are you okay? I know your mom turning up was hard for you, but I’ve never seen you look this stressed before,” He paused, “Ok, you always look stressed - but I’ve never seen you look so exhausted before.” 

Alec shrugged, picking up the shirt he had previously discarded as he made his way towards the entrance to the training room. 

“It’s just things getting on top of me, you don’t need to worry.” 

Jace jogged after him, huffing at his answer, “That’s what I do man! I’m your  _ Parabatai _ , I worry about you!”

Alec snorted, unamused. “Sure. Look, Jace, leave it okay? I’m fine.”

“Alec!” Jace’s arm reached out, grabbing his bicep - forcing him to a stop. “I  _ do _ care. I just want to make sure you’re okay! Look, I tried leaving it alone, but your work is slipping and I  _ know  _ you’re having a hard time with everything. So, maybe you need to stop going out so much.” He flapped his hand when he saw Alec move to interrupt, “No Alec. I’m not asking you where you go. I’m not saying you should stop. I’m just suggesting you do it less, you’re obviously overwhelmed. ” Jace chuckled, squeezing Alec’s arm slightly, “Besides, imagine if you were this exhausted on a mission! You could put us all in jeopardy, can you really risk that?” 

Alec scowled at him; “Let me get this straight, I’m overwhelmed so I should give up the one thing in my life that gives me a break from my duties? Instead of you or Izzy making my life  _ easier _ , and attempting to cause less trouble for me - I’m the one that needs to sacrifice things?” Alec snatched his arm back from Jace’s grip, “Focus on my paperwork, go back to being your pushover of a  _ Parabatai _ ? Only being considered useful when either you or Izzy need something done?”

“You’re putting words in my mouth!” 

“No. For once I’m hearing exactly what you're saying.” Alec shook his head and began to walk away from him.

“Alec!” 

“Don’t worry about me Jace. I’ve been looking out for you and Izzy for years with everything else on my plate. I think I can handle this just fine on my own.” With that he swept away from his  _ Parabatai _ , leaving him stood slack-jawed in the corridor. 

He pulls on his shirt as he walks, heading towards the doors of The Institute. He felt even angrier now, he needed an outlet - he decided to head towards Magnus’ place. 

Clary had taken an interest in learning how to defend herself, and while a training session with her would likely increase his overall frustration he had promised her that he would try to get away more to help her. 

_ Besides _ , he thought, Magnus will be there, and it’s hard being frustrated with him around. 

“I met up with my mom today.” The crash of one staff against another as Clary spoke. 

Alec grunted at her as he nudged her back with one end of his staff, “How’d it go?” 

“I don’t know? Not great I guess? I told her about Simon, and she... she reacted really weirdly. I don’t know how to explain it, but she was so disconnected from the conversation after I told her.” 

“Disconnected?” He ducked under her sloppy swing, “How do you mean?” 

“She just closed up after I told her what had happened. I don’t know how to explain it - I’ve never seen her like that before.” She let out a nervous squeak as he grabbed her wrist and flung her behind him, causing her to stumble slightly.

“Maybe she was just concerned, Clary - you told me Simon was your childhood friend; she probably feels like one of her kids was ripped away from her.”

“Sure, at first she was just concerned after I'd told her we’d informed Simon of the Shadow World - but after I told her about the whole,” She lunged for Alec, “Vampire thing.” 

He deflected her hit easily but nodded slightly as he took in her form. 

“So, she wasn’t happy finding out Simon was a vampire? That’s not surprising Clary, it’s not a happy discovery - especially when he was forced into the change under unwilling circumstances.” He brought up his weapon, swinging it down with a small amount of force, “You can’t be shocked that she’d be unhappy about it.” 

Clary ducked under the swing, spinning away from him gracefully - sticking her tongue out once she came to a stop on the other side of the room.

Alec snorted and shook his head, “Very good, but you leave yourself open for an attack doing that Fray.” 

She giggled wildly at him for a second before her good mood faded again, “It’s not that Alec, she,” her mouth curled into an angry frown, “She told me to stay away from him, that he was a monster now and I shouldn’t be around someone who can’t control themselves properly.” She dropped her staff to the floor as she hugged herself.

Alec sighed at her, chucking his own staff to the side as he approached her. He placed his hands on her shoulders, “Clary she’s right.” 

Clary’s head shot up, anger loud on her face.

“Not about him being a monster, but he’s not able to control himself properly yet.” He shook his head to stop her from interrupting, “Now listen, it won’t be like this forever - you’ve met Raphael, he’s perfectly in control, so are the majority of vampires you’ll encounter. I’m telling you that now Simon is dangerous to you. He has to learn how to 'live' as a vampire, and you can’t help with that.” 

“But-” 

“Once he’s fully in control you can see him as much as you like - he’s going to need your support, his entire life will have been flipped upside down. He’ll be depending on you to help him. So, while your mom was wrong in calling him a monster and her phrasing in general, please take into consideration the fact that he needs to be helped by other vampires before you can help him.” 

“I- Yeah. You’re right Alec, of course, your right. It’s just how she worded it. How quickly she changed from being concerned over his well-being to dismissing him completely as someone she’d cared for.”

Alec’s eyes narrowed as he thought about it. 

“Hm. You’re correct that is concerning, especially if that’s how she worded it.” He hummed softly, “Are you going to meet up with her again?” 

“I don’t know. Do you think I should?” 

“That’s not a decision I can make for you, she’s your mom and this is your choice - but I will support you whatever you decide.” 

“Thank you Alec, I guess I need to think about it a bit more, but I do want to make up with her completely at some point. She’s my mom and I love her after all.” 

“That’s perfectly valid. You need to take time to come to grips with everything that’s happened. You’ve been through a lot lately and sometimes your feelings can’t easily be interpreted.”

“You’re right, thank you for listening to me.” 

He threw an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into a side hug. 

“Hey, sometimes things need talking out to be properly understood. Especially things concerning emotions, doubly so when it’s things you’ve never experienced before.”

“Like your crush on Magnus?” 

He shoved her away lightly. 

“Clary! I don’t- No- Like  _ your  _ crush on Magnus!” 

“Wow. Good comeback.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this!! Thanks for every single bookmark, kudos and comment, I really, really appreciate it!! It's what keeps me motivated
> 
> I had the Alec and Clary training scene and the Alec/Jace confrontation in my head for WEEKS so to actually get it out there? WHOOOO huge breath of relief - we're slowly getting closer to the start of the series in my timeline guys aaay. 
> 
> I just want Alec to stand up for himself guys :( It's what he deserves.
> 
> Also, although Alec admits he has (seriously the tinest you've got to believe him it's so small really!!!!) crush on Magnus - they're not gonna be in a relationship anytime soon... probably... Nah I'm serious there are going to be pre-relationship moments but I've not set a secure time for when they're getting together, I really want them to be friends first! 
> 
> Thanks for reading everyone ILU!


	12. Communication is Key

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “That’s okay Alexander. Knowing yourself is the hardest part of life - no one is going to be angry with you for taking your time.” 
> 
> Alec coughed uncomfortably, picking up the glass he had discarded earlier and taking a solidifying sip. 
> 
> “Anything else you’d like to know?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *insert that pic of marge simpson hiding behind her hand her* - i have no excuses beyond real life getting ahead of me. however, i recently had a burst of inspiration (and another burst of being on furlough) so a fire has been lit under me.
> 
> enjoy the chapter, i spent hours on it because every time i would write something i would despise it with an unholy passion. i hope this is up to scratch finally haha (also still not beta read and also i lowkey didnt even reread it bc i started hating myself haha if u find see mistakes look AWAY)
> 
> theres a bit of a time skip from the last chapter because i could not for the life of me figure out how to naturally continue without doing a bit of a jump please let me know what you think!

“Tell me something about yourself - something that nobody else could claim to know.” 

Alec hummed distractedly, he tilted the glass in his hand, the red wine sloshing against the sides. His back resting on the cold wall of the balcony. He glanced back through the double doors, waving back when Clary excitedly waved her hand at him, never pausing in her constant chatter to Simon. The newly reunited pair were beyond excited to reconnect after months of absence. 

“Well, what kind of thing would you want to know?” 

Magnus tapped the tip of his pointer finger against his chin in an exaggerated moment of false consideration, loudly humming for a second before snapping his fingers sharply. 

“Your favourite colour!” 

Alec let out a shocked laugh, hopelessly charmed by the easy-going atmosphere that Magnus had cultivated. 

“Would you believe it’s yellow?” 

Magnus grasped his glass tightly to his chest, his now empty hand jumping to cover his mouth as he gasped in an exaggerated way.

“ Yellow ? Why Alexander you do surprise me.” 

They laughed together easily for a moment before they lapsed into a content silence. 

Which  broke seconds later by a loud shout of delight from Clary’s side of the doors. Alec rolled his eyes, smiling at the sight of Cla ry reaching out teasingly in  trying to touch Simon’s fangs - only for Simon to pretend to chomp down on her fingers  when they got anywhere near him. Clary finally gave in and ripped her hand back tucking it into her armpit as she crossed her arms sternly; before sticking her tongue out at Simon in a child-like show of annoyance. Simon quickly followed her example, only to graze his tongue on his new features and retract it quickly - his hand coming to cup his mouth as he pouted. They’d been catching up for hours now, like two  long-lost friends who hadn’t seen each other in years  and not months. 

Magnus chuckled beside him, “They remind me of a pair of siblings.” 

“Really? They just remind me of  children .” Alec’s voice rose at the end of his sentence, clearly trying to mock the two. Clary glared lightly at him before smirking slyly, she rose from her seat and slammed the balcony doors closed, the curtains closing soon after.

“See?” Alec muttered into his wine, “Children.” 

“You say that Alexander, like you weren’t the same way when you were younger.” 

Alec laughed, “I wasn’t! I couldn’t afford to be; I had high expectations placed on me, add on top of that looking after my rebellious siblings while my parents were busy? I had no time for childish things.” 

Magnus frowned, finding out the older Lightwood’s had left their eldest in charge even when he was younger wasn’t surprising - Alec had the type of attitude that came from too much weight being placed on too young shoulders, but he had to know more. 

“How do they treat you?” 

Alec paused, his shoulders tensing as the question reached him. The sip of wine he’d taken burning as he swallowed, he coughed weakly,

“Who-  What  do you mean?” 

“What I mean, Alexander - is that when you visit your entire body is tight with tension, you refuse to make eye contact until you feel fully comfortable and quite honestly you look exhausted constantly, now I would like to assume that this is just the crown resting heavily upon your head. However- ” 

Alec turned so his body was facing the city, shakily he placed his wine glass down on the ledge - his hands trembling slightly as he grabbed stone - his eyes squeezing shut as his eyebrows furrowed with confusion. Magnus paused in his ranting as Alec positioned himself.

“Maybe that’s just how I act? Not wanting to make eye contact isn’t a big issue-” He glances at Magnus, “It- It isn’t is it?” 

“On its own? Of course not. A great number of people I knew despise making eye contact, and that’s perfectly reasonable! However, add in the other factors, and the information you’ve just given me about your parent's high expectations and caring for your siblings? Alexander, it’s concerning.” 

“Concerning? Magnus, I’m fine! I need to do what’s best for my family regardless of whatever impact it has on me. It’s my duty.” 

“Alexander.”

“Don’t. Please.”

Magnus reached out slowly, grasping Alec’s hand where he had started to pinch at the skin without much thought. 

“I myself have a bit of responsibility laid at my feet, I’m the High Warlock of Brooklyn you know,” here he nudged Alec gently with his elbow, perking up when he saw the side of Alec’s lips jolt. “It’s a lot to deal with, people needing your support - coming to you with things they expect you to deal with regardless of your own situation. It’s a big burden to heft on your own, I know how stressed I can get dealing with everything, and hile I’ve never dealt with being in charge of an entire institute full of angelic soldiers; two of whom are younger, ‘rebellious’ siblings - I hope you know that you can talk to me anytime about what you’re going through.” 

Alec smiled weakly, “You know I think that’s the first time anyone’s offered to listen to my problems sincerely.” He attempted to joke, only to falter at the small frown that graced Magnus’ features. 

  
“I mean it, Alexander, we’ve known each other for a while now and I need you to understand that if you ever need anything; alcohol, comfort, a place to stay to get away from your horrible siblings -  anything  you just have to say the word.” 

“They’re really not that bad,” 

“Maybe you should tell me a bit more about them, after all, I only ever hear the bad things you have to say when you storm in angrily after another confrontation.” 

Alec chuckled stiffly pulling his hand away from Magnus’; “Well, considering how little they follow any of my orders on missions is it surprising that I only have bad things to say most of the time-” Then he coughed, clearing his throat loudly as he winced at the bitterness his tone had held. “I- I didn’t mean it like that of course, they’re a big help.” 

He takes a deep breath and begins to talk 

"Izzy - Isabelle. My younger sister, she's amazing, the most intelligent person I know. She’s highly skilled at combat both hand-to-hand and with weapons; she’s also who I would regard as the best forensic pathologist in the city, both in the Shadow World and in the Mundane society as she’s trained in both.” He sighed, “But besides that, she’s so loveable. I would do anything for her, our brother would do anything for her; hell even my father who could barely stand to be around me as a child  adored  Izzy, she’s perfect.” Alec turned slightly to look at Magnus, 

“You’d love her as well, she’s into fashion and makeup while still being the most badass person in the world. You’d really get on, hell I’d even bet that Clary and Izzy would be the best of friends. She’s great at making friends easily, Izzy’s the life of the party - I’ve yet to meet anyone who met her and didn’t love everything about her.”

He huffed slightly; 

“The opposite of me.” 

Magnus immediately opened his mouth to sprout an objection, but Alec steamrolls ahead, 

“Next is Jace, my  Parabatai.  Incomparable in battle, an expert swordsman like no other I’ve ever seen and a brilliant soldier when he wants to. He’s- I used to consider him the best friend I’d ever have. I thought everything he did was amazing, and that I’d never measure up to him - I guess I was right. Even as acting Head of the Institute I feel like I’m just a placeholder until he’s ready to step up.” Alec took a large breath, “I used to think I was in love with him,” He whispers into the air, “I- I never said anything, of course I now know I wasn’t actually in love with him. I was just looking for an excuse to never face who I was. Who I  am. ”

Alec turned to Magnus, taking a deep breath. “I still don’t think I’m ready to admit it. Not out loud at least.” 

“That’s okay Alexander. Knowing yourself is the hardest part of life - no one will be angry with you for taking your time.” 

Alec coughed uncomfortably, picking up the glass he had discarded earlier and took a solidifying sip. 

  
“Anything else you’d like to know?” 

“Anything else you’re willing to share, I want to know more about you, Alexander, I want to know anything that’s bothering you or that’s important to you.” 

There’s a pause before Alec takes a deep breath and starts to talk, staring out into the night. 

“Sometimes, I get so frustrated, so  angry with their behaviour. Both how they act around me and how they act on the field - and then I feel this all-consuming  guilt  because those are my siblings, I’m supposed to love them no matter what,” He laughs wetly; “How bad a brother must I be to allow something like this frustrate me to the point of genuine anger” He glanced at Magnus when he felt a hand settle on his shoulder. 

“I can see where you’re coming from Alexander, but at the end of the day there comes a point when you need to stop seeing them as just your siblings; they are your subordinates. I understand that it can be a very thin line to walk - and you do it well, although it seems to be from your descriptions that they don’t quite know how to differentiate between you as a leader and you as their brother.” Magnus sighed, “I don’t believe it would be such an issue if you weren’t part of such an influential member of the Shadowhunter politics, however with your position your siblings refusing to consider you as a leader is deeply inconsiderate of them.”

Alec hummed noncommittal, shrugging sulkily. 

“Alexander, you’re a good brother. One thing I know about you without a doubt is that you love your siblings and you would do anything for them, including supporting them when they make you want to rip your hair out - that’s how you know someone is a good older brother.” 

Magnus sighed as he realised Alec had closed himself off again, his stance defensive as he hunched over slightly - still staring out into the distance.

“Let me tell you about the time I traveled to the City of the Dead with a librarian and her brother, where we awoke a cursed High Priest who was looking for his-” 

-‐

Simon laughed along with Clary as she slammed the doors to the balcony then pulled the curtains closed with a flourish, cutting Alec and Magnus from view. She whirled around dramatically, Simon smiled at her, 

“You forcing them to bond now?” 

Clary cackled, 

“Trust me when I say; they don’t need to be forced.” She settled back on the sofa opposite. 

Simon smiled at her, happy to finally be around his best friend again. 

“So now that it’s just the two of us, twenty questions? Interrogation-style?” He questioned.

“As always,” Clary nodded “So? What’s it like?”    
  
“Being a vampire?” 

“No, you idiot, being a bat - of  course  being a vampire! Is it weird?” She made fangs with her fingers. 

“I’m pretty sure that’s offensive to Vampires.” Simon laughed easily; “It’s weird I’ll admit that, it’s like - you know when you really want a certain type of food? And it’s literally all you can think about even when you’re focusing on something else?” 

She hummed. 

“It’s like that but more intense. How are you doing here?” 

“I’m okay, I miss my mom but things are still a bit tense - she’s been a bit weird lately, we meet up for lunch every week but something about her recently has been off. I’m seeing her again tomorrow” She shrugged helplessly, “It should be just as awkward as normal. Have you spoken to your family recently?” 

Simon’s eyes flitted to the ground, biting his lip nervously, “Raph took me to see them for the last time before he used  Encanto  to make them think that I was going away for a while, I- I know eventually I’ll need to deal with them more permanently but the thought of them thinking I was dead I couldn’t do it, Clary,” He scrubs his fists over his eyes. “Raph was nice about it- I mean, in his own way but he made it really clear to me that eventually I would have to do something more permanent so they don’t hunt me down.” 

Clary winced sympathetically, reaching out a hand she curled their fingers together in a loose hold.    
  


“Come on cold-hands,” She joked lightly, “Your turn.” 

“Okay Fray; how’s your super important training with the very scary Shadowhunter going?” 

“Well, Alec’s a hard taskmaster - he’s determined to get me up to his standards, which are pretty damn high I won’t lie.” 

“Rather you than me, he seems terrifying.”

Clary snorted, “Alec? He’s a big softie really, just got a real tough exterior. Speaking of which, can you hear anything out there? Were you blessed with super hearing?”    
  
“Hmm, I was; it was an utter bitch to learn to deal with - however, I think Magnus’  wards  prevent any eavesdropping,” 

“Probably for the best,” Clary winked before falling into giggles, “Who knows what they could be getting up to?” 

Simon laughed along with her, thankful for some levity after such a difficult topic.

They continued with the question rounds for a little while, Magnus and Alec joining them from the balcony end. Alec looked a little worse for wear, Clary glanced at him in concern but he waved her off with a strained smile. 

-‐

“So I’m on the floor - refusing to allow anyone to bring me blood because I thought it was too inhumane, I mean ‘drinking blood’? Ew, no thanks. Raphael comes over to me; curled up on the floor and in pain - and says, ‘you died once idiot, do you want to do it again?’ and I said ‘well I’m a vampire I can’t die of starvation right?’ Except I’m pretty sure it just comes out as a batch of incoherent mumbles. Raph obviously hears me though and he shakes his head, looks me in the eyes; ‘No but if you keep frustrating me I make no promises about what I’ll do.’, and then he  smiles at me.  I don’t think I’ve ever gulped something down so quickly in my entire life I was so freaked out!” 

Clary smiled as Simon came to the end of his story, taking in how he laughed easily at something they would have before considered a sort of disturbing story. She’d missed him, the months that he’d been learning to control his new vampire self had been near torture. Sure Magnus and Alec were great company and at this point, she didn’t know what she would do without them but her friendship with Simon was different; after being friends for so long, seeing each other every single day since childhood - to go  months  without seeing one another? It affected her more than she thought it would. 

She shook herself out of her thoughts as Magnus launched into his own story about a newly turned Vampire, his story emphasised with dramatic hand movement and occasional winks to Alec sitting beside him. 

“-he’s accepted into their small clan, although really it was more of a houseshare situation-” 

The story he was telling is interrupted by an impatient knock at the door, Magnus huffed and gestures in the general direction of the door, opening them without looking. “You know you don’t have to knock Raphael.” 

“It’s almost sunrise.” He said, blatantly ignoring Magnus’ statement, “We have plenty of time to get back to the hotel and get settled.” Raphael glanced around, “Magnus can I talk to you? Bring your Shadowhunter.”

Alec and Magnus shared a glance, before standing as one and following Raphael into the kitchen. 

“Notice Alec didn’t protest the ‘your Shadowhunter’” Clary said, waggling her eyebrows suggestively. 

Simon snorted and playfully knocked her shoulder.

“So?” 

He looked up at her, “What?” 

“Raphael hm?” 

“Clary…” 

  
“I’m just saying, don't forget me when you and your Vampire tutor fall in love, hmm.” 

Choosing to ignore what she was trying to implicate, he laughed, 

“Forgetting you Fray? Nah you’re much too deeply ingrained in this noggin of mine.” Simon joked as he pulled her into a hug, “Say ‘hi’ to your mom for me when you see her tomorrow.” 

Clary winced softly before pulling out of the hug, “Of course, I’m sure she’ll be happy to hear from you…” She smiled at him weakly. 

“Ok, time to go fledgling.” 

He waved to Alec and Magnus, both of whom were standing in the doorway after they’d finished their chat with Raphael, both of their faces marred with concern.

“See you guys soon?” 

“Real soon Si.” 

As Simon turned and left the loft with Raphael he couldn’t shake the feeling of uncertainty that had settled over him, he glanced at Rapahel trying to ascertain if the older Vampire had noticed - seeing him unaffected Simon desperately tried to put the feeling aside for the moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *slaps alec lightwood* this bad boy can fit so much childhood trauma in it
> 
> was it good? was it okay? was it fucking horrible? (most likely) i hope you enjoy it anyway! 
> 
> i may have to go back and redo multiple chapters because re-reading through this? i noticed things that in the future could possibly cause continuity errors 
> 
> ALSO to defend some of my decisions in advance: in my mind alec has been around these people (clary and magnus) for a few months now so he would be a lot more open, (both taking the time jump into account and being around someone as comfortable w his sexuality as one magnus bane? surely does smth for yer confidence) i still think he'll be struggling w internalized homophobia (bc do we ever stop being effected by our internalized issues?) 
> 
> & im sorry, but trying to keep alecs descriptions of his siblings on the line of professional leader describing his subordinates, caring older brother being proud of his siblings and PURE self-hate was DIFFICULT 
> 
> IM ALSO ABOUT TO RIP MY HAIR OUT TRYNA DEAL W THE CAMILLE STUFF ARGH wish me luck pls (and if anyone has any tips/ideas *eyes emoji* lemme know


	13. Not Bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey! Can you watch where you’re going?”, She frantically brushed her wet hair from her eyes as she tried to act as intimidating as possible. Squinting slightly to see through the heavy downpour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> new chapter? I hardly know 'er! 
> 
> thank you so much to every single person that commented on the last chapter! I love every one of you sm! 
> 
> we're uuuurrrr in the thick of it now lads ayay 
> 
> pretty unedited beyond me reading through it once & sending it maia for her to read bits at a time sjdkf so please lemme know of any mistakes (im sure there are many) but be nice about or i shall cry

Clary tapped her foot impatiently, she checked her watch again - for what must have been the twentieth time in an hour. She was here to meet up with her mom, it’d been a regular occurrence for the past few months; they’d been seeing each other trying to strengthen the bond they felt they had lost. It was tough work, but something they were both willing to put effort into. While Clary still felt somewhat betrayed by the way her mom had kept things from her, she still wanted a relationship with her. 

She crossed her arms huffily to stop herself from checking her watch again. She restlessly shuffled her feet, tapping her fingers against her arms. She unfolded her arms to lean them on the table, first wrapping her hands around her coffee cup, swirling the drink in the cup viciously - looking into the cup as she let the liquid settle. She released the cup, pulling her hands back to let them settle on the table, before immediately starting to tap her fingernails against the table in a nervous rhythm. She struggled to pull her phone out of her pocket and sent off a message to her mom, asking her where she was, adding at the end that she wouldn’t be able to wait much longer, hoping that mentioning that she had plans after would cause her mom to speed up. 

Clary waited for another twenty minutes before huffing in frustration, pushing herself up from her seat, the chair making a loud noise as it was pushed back. She flushed slightly when she noticed people turn to look at her dramatic display. Ignoring the stares as much as she could, she spun on her heel and marched determinedly out of the cafe.

Clary paused briefly when she left the cafe, her phone still in her hand she shot off a text to Luke and Alec. The one to Luke asking if he’d heard from her mom recently, and the text to Alec informing him of the fact that her mom was a no show and that she’d be longer than she’d thought because she wanted to ‘check-in’; and telling him she wouldn’t be able to make their regularly scheduled training session. Even as she sent the text she acknowledged with a chuckle that he probably wouldn’t notice the text till after he and Magnus were finished with their ‘It’s-Not-A-Date-Clary-Shut-Up!’-date, she just felt like she needed to let him know what was happening, just in case. She tucked away her phone, storing it safely back in her pocket. 

As Clary walked, the grey sky above her rumbled, the dark clouds heavy with rain. Glancing skyward she groaned, cursing her bad luck. With a crash, the rain poured down with a roar, the rain cold and sharp on her exposed skin. She glanced back at the cafe before deciding to chance it, her mom’s house would hold a change of clothes, which given how her current outfit was weighing her down was desperately needed. Clary picked up her pace, breaking into a run in a hopeless attempt to make it into a warm house sooner. She grunted as her shoulder crashed into another person, she spun gracelessly with the momentum, glaring at the blonde who’d continued to walk, not even bothering with a glance back at her. 

“Hey! Can you watch where you’re going?”, She frantically brushed her wet hair from her eyes as she tried to act as intimidating as possible. Squinting slightly to see through the heavy downpour.

Clary only realised that the man she had confronted was a Shadowhunter as he turned to face her, some of his tatt-  _ runes  _ different to the ones Alec had; the lack of a massive neck  _ rune _ the most glaringly obvious difference. However the clothing choices were undeniably familiar, the overwhelming amount of black fabric that was likely hiding more bloodstains than she was willing to think about.

“You can see me?” 

She scoffed at the question, so similar to the one Alec had asked her months ago, albeit the tone completely different - his voice easily holding an air of arrogance that Alec had only once demonstrated when he was teaching her about how to deal with politics in the Shadow World. 

“Yeah. Obviously, you can’t see me though you rude asshole.” 

Ignoring his stuttered words she returned to her planned route, boots hitting the ground loudly with her frustration still focused majorly on her mom, she didn’t have time to deal with this Shadowhunter - should she have ignored him? Alec would have; he would’ve taken the knock and kept on walking like nothing happened - just to keep the suspicion off of him, to keep it subtle. That’s not her though. Clary Fray isn’t about to let some high and mighty Shadowhunter walk all over her. Especially not when she had to get to her mom. 

As she ran, Clary pondered over whether she should have tried to contact Dot, the woman was like a sister to her, plus she would definitely have some sort of idea about where her mom was considering Dot worked in the shop. However they hadn’t talked recently, and she felt like the sudden call to Dot - not for a catch-up but just to demand the location of her mother would be entirely too thoughtless. 

‘Besides,’ she thought, ‘Nothing bad has happened, no need to bother Dot while she’s at work.’ 

Clary slows as the shop comes into view, easily noticing the lack of light in the shop. The darkness created by the rain and clouds not helping as she tries to peer in as she wanders past. She shakes her head in confusion, it was barely past midday, the store should have been open for hours at this point. 

Her frustration died slowly, worry starting to build inside of her. She bit her lip as she considered her options, she ran over to the alley that leads behind the shop, the anxiety overwhelming her as she went. She stumbled to a standstill as she took in the destruction of her home. The double doors that lead into the building hang precariously by their hinges, the glass from them completely shattered; littering the floor with its remains. 

Clary’s mind raced as she stared at the building, almost all of the windows were smashed, one of them - the one for her old room her mind supplied; blackened with soot, small flames still visible inside from where she was standing. 

“Mom?!” She screamed, running up the stairs - desperation heavy in her voice. She almost tripped on glass as she ran through the destroyed door, her new boots slippery underfoot. Her breath heavy in her chest, hands shaking as she took in the pure destruction of what was once her home. Blood and crushed glass mingled together, evidence of what had happened previously. There was no sign of either her mom or Dot, the whole house bathed in darkness. 

  
  


“ _ Mom _ !” Clary was wailing at this point, her knees crashing to the floor as her whole body shook. “Mom,  _ please _ !”

She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t think. Her mind clouded with thoughts of how she and her mom hadn’t been getting on recently; how their barely civil conversations had twisted into whispered arguments over the lips of their coffee mugs. They’d seemed so important at the time, so  _ integral.  _ Now here she was, hands tangled into her hair, knotting around the curled digits as she tugged desperately at her scalp - because her mom was nowhere to be found and the last thing she’d said to her had been some passive aggressive bullshit that she couldn’t recall in her state of panic. 

Clary isn’t sure how long she sits there, later she will be asked and it’ll be impossible for her to remember. All she knows in that moment is the great wheezing breaths she’s trying to unsuccessfully take, the rain knocking demandingly against the floor as it sneaks inside through the fragmented glass. It isn’t until she hears a jarring creak echo through the air that she realises with a numb clam that there may still be someone in the house with her. 

Her sobs quieten, her chest still heaving with incomplete breaths. Her hands shook as she reached up to grab an overturned piece of furniture, using it to help her regain her footing. Thunder crashed in the distance, starling her into action. She stumbles, struggling to get her feet to work as she ducked, bypassing the heavy-looking axe that stood against the wall near where she had dropped, and picking up what she knows to be an inactive seraph blade. She doesn’t take time to think about where it had come from, knowing she would hate the answer. 

It jolts to light in her hand, the room suddenly saturated in a vivid blue light. She holds it in a strong grip; uncertain, yet confident. She had never held one before, Alec stating that until she could actually fight with a wooden blade she wouldn’t do well with a real one. Well, Alec wasn’t here now - it was just her, and whatever had made that noise on the upper level. 

Clary breathed deeply in an attempt to control her panic, she glanced around cautiously trying to build up the nerve to explore the ravaged house. She knew logically that she needed to see if there were any bodies. She held in a whimper at the thought, she shifted her blade into a more comfortable hold - before starting to cautiously move forward. 

It was like a horror movie, the rooms only being lit by the blade in her hand as she moved. The darkness matching the cold silence of a place that used to mean comfort and warmth, her stuttered breathing loud in the obscurity broken only by the click of her heels as she moved. Joined soon by the creak of the occasional step as she progressed up the stairs in her search.

“Dot?” She asked into the dark. Not holding out much hope for much of an answer. 

“Clary?” A whisper. 

She spun around hope burning in her heart, taking in the sight of the woman behind her.

She looked fine, not a bruise or any of blood on her. Clary didn’t try and stifle the happiness that filled her veins as she took in Dot’s form. She lowered the blade as she moved closer to the woman though, Magnus’ warning of what certain demons could do rang in her ears - but she had to know. 

“Dot, what happened? Wh-where's my mom?” 

“They took Jocelyn. Rogue Shadowhunters, searching for the Mortal Cup.” 

“Mortal  _ what?  _ Rogue Shadowhunters? Do you mean The Circle? How is that possible, Dot? _ ”  _

“Think Clary. Did your mother ever tell you anything about a cup? It’s a very important cup, Clary. It’s gold, like a chalice.” 

“What the fuck are you talking about? No. She never mentioned a  _ cup,  _ why would she have?” 

“Think Clary, you have to know something about it.” 

“I don’t have to know anything! My mother is  _ missing!  _ What happened here Dot?” 

Dot growled low in her throat, her hands curling into claws.

“You know more than you think you do Clary Fray.”

Dot leapt at Clary, her mouth shifting into a gaping maw, jaw cracking grotesquely as it began to deform, unfurling like a rafflesia; splitting open into four different directions, an innumerable amount of teeth lining each large portion of the broken skin, the points of each flap adorned with sharp tusk-like points. 

Clary screamed as the demon leaped at her, flailing slightly as she desperately attempted to bring the blade up to protect herself. She was able to shove the creature away, it landed sprawled on the floor as she stumbled backward, it had caught her shoulder; she noted absentmindedly. She fought with her subconscious need to clutch at the sluggishly bleeding wound. 

The demon screeched as it leaped towards her once more, aiming to catch her injured shoulder again as she managed to duck. She danced further out of its grip, trying to force a false calm over her mind. It aimed for her again, its unearthly growling making her want to shake and hide. Waiting until it was nearly on top of her she thrust forward with the sword in her arm; stabbing at its middle violently. 

She had to hold back a cheer as she saw that the hit had landed, the squelch as she pulled back the blade causing her to flinch as the demon turned to ash in front of her very eyes. Clary coughed weakly, dropping the blade as the last traces of it faded into the air. Her knees gave out on her, she dropped to the floor in a bloody mimicry of the position she had collapsed in earlier. Her vision swam as she realised there was a figure making their way towards her; light hair, dark clothes. 

“Not bad, for a newbie.” 

As she collapsed she wished she could scoff at the person patronising her, but she only had enough strength to think about how much Alec was going to murder her for this. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whatcha think? lemme knowwww 
> 
> im desperately trying to have a clary that is still a very entitled person but also has learned stuff from being around magnus & alec so the actions from the canon that im choosing to keep will make sense, also im trying to not breathe how much i dislike jace into this fic bc thats not very fair HOWEVER boy is it hard. 
> 
> do i feel like ive rushed into tackling the series? lowkey yeah - so im thinking of doing a separate fic w like lil friendship stories btwn Alec & Clary! Lemme know if you have anything you'd like to see in that? (Not limited to Clary & Alec either; friendship stories in general maybe? idk its a brainstorm at the moment!) 
> 
> hope your enjoying the fic!

**Author's Note:**

> thanks to maia who supported me (and will continue to support and enable me) through this ilu <3


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